


Awkward Hugs

by deansdamnation



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M, selfharm, some sexual scenes between dean and cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-27 22:00:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 29,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6301936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deansdamnation/pseuds/deansdamnation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A destiel fic.<br/>Inspired by the song Awkward Situations  by The Front Bottoms.<br/>An awkward Cas meets Dean and they become friends in high school, but could a secret Castiel is keeping from Dean become a fatal one?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

"Dude, I didn't know you smoked." Said Dean surprised looking at castiel. Castiel took the cigarette out of his mouth. "It lowers stress." Cas sighed not wanting to look at the taller boy. He didn't have to explain himself to him. He knew what he was doing. 

"I don't care, just didn't peg you as the kind of guy who would smoke. Mr. Uptight-know-it-all." Dean laughed leaning on the wall next to Castiel. 

"I'm not...." Cas sighed again, "Please don't call me that, Dean." He said looking over at the boy. He was tired and exhausted from school and home. This was his escape and Dean was ruining it.

"Stop being such a whiny bitch." Dean didn't understand what's this guy problem was. To him he was just an awkward nerd with pretty blue eyes and messy black hair. Damn he didn't talk much to him, but he did like to think about him at night. Something about him made Dean crazy. Dean was a high school jock who got all the girls. He could even get a guy if he wanted. Maybe it was the fact he couldn't get Castiel that made Dean want Him.

Castiel had enough today. A couple of kids decided it would be funny if they tormented him in the hallway. He needed to be alone. He especially did not need someone who was going to make fun of him more. He needed his escape. He walked away ignoring Dean. He put the cigarette back in his mouth the smoke stinging his already tearing eyes.

"Yeah go cry home to mama!" Dean called after him. Dean regretted that as soon as the words flew out of his mouth. He liked this boy and he was making fun of him. He didn't really understand why he said it, but it was to late to take it back or apologize. 

Castiel tuned around his cheeks flamed with anger, "at least I have a mother to go home to." Cas spat at Dean. Cas didn't care anymore he hoped that hurt Dean like a knife in his back. He never said anything that cruel to someone, but honestly it felt great. The tears in his eyes were replaced with a wave of rage. It was now deans turn to have his eyes well up with tears and that they did. His mother died when he was younger and he missed her everyday. Dean knew what he said wasn't very nice, but what he said this cruel? He blamed himself for this too just like he always did. Dean stood there mumbling silent stutters. Looking like a child who was just pants in the middle of the cafeteria. Castiel started to realize what he said and the regret started to settle in. He sometimes forgot that he wasn't the only one that could be hurt. "I'm-I'm-sorry Dean....I didn't mean to do that..." Castiel shoved the cigarette in the palm of his hand. It hurt. It burned. Once the cigarette stopped hurting him he dropped it on the ground and covered his hand with his long sleeve. Dean was now looking away tears rolling down his cheeks. 

"Get it together!" Dean could hear his father scream in his head. Dean breathed a shaky breath turning back towards Cas. He wiped the snot from his nose with his worn leather jacket. Dean tried to form coherent words, but still his voice did not carry. Castiel walked over to Dean and took him into his arms. How awkward this hug may have been Dean didn't resist it. No one has ever really been kind to him the way Castiel was being now. Yes of course Castiel hurt Dean, but Dean forgot about what he said as soon as Cas touched him. He was warm and had that stale cigarette smoke lingering on his clothes. Dean took a deep breath and buried his head into castiels dirty coat. He felt like he finally had a friend through this awkward hug. It didn't really make sense to Dean, but he welcomed the feeling.

Castiel hated what he had said when he saw how much it hurt Dean. That angry Castiel was not the person Castiel liked, but he feared. Living inside him like a dark creature waiting to escape. Always there, but not always hiding. Castiel struggled to keep it in everyday, but this awkward hug made him forget the darkness. He held Dean for a long time before he realized that Dean had either passed out or fell asleep. Cas sat down and held the sleeping boy close to him. It finally felt like a home. That maybe Dean was more of a pretty boy jerk, but a broken boy putting up this pretty boy front. Cas broke the front and Dean relived Cas of his darkness. 

Castiel woke Dean up after awhile. "Th-thanks Cas." Dean quietly thanked him not wanting to move. 

"I am sorry for what I said Dean I-" Cas was cut off by Dean.

"It's fine, just don't do that again." Cas nods and stands up helping Dean off the ground. 

"Dean--would you...like to have dinner at my house? My parents aren't home and I would really enjoy your company tonight...." Cas trailed off. Dean smiles a little.

"Hell yeah. I'm starving!" Dean said as if none of that happened. Castiel smiled and he walked Dean to his house. Finally Cas had a friend. And so did Dean. Maybe everything would be okay.

*****


	2. Chapter Two

"Uh take your shoes off, please." Said Cas slipping off his shoes and placing them on the rug side by side.

"Dude you wear that dirty ass coat of yours, smoke, but you take off your shoes?" Dean scoffed not wanting to remove his shoes. His boots smelled bad and so did his socks. He wasn't planing on taking them off in someone else company.

"My parents....they have rules and if you break them they can be.....scary." Cas said taking off his coat and folding it over his arm. Dean groaned taking off his smelly boots. Cas was going feed him after all. Cas frowned at smell of deans sweaty feet. Dean looked down at his feet and wiggled his toes. "I'll make dinner. There is a shower up the stairs on your right." Cas said nothing more and headed into the kitchen. Dean groaned trudging up the white carpet steps. White walls. No pictures hanging not a spec of dirt. This family is weird Dean thought heading into the bathroom and shutting the door. Dean turns on the water and undresses throwing his clothes into a messy heap. After ten minutes he gets out a grabs the white towel and dries off. Dean notices his dirty clothes missing from the floor.

"Cas! You little perv what did you do to my clothes?!" Dean yelled from the bathroom wrapping the towel around his waist. He didn't think Cas was that kind of guy. 

"I didn't think you would want to change back into them." Said Cas outside of the bathroom door. Dean opened the door his wet hair sticking up. he sees Cas holding fresh folded clothes in his arms. 

"I'm bigger than you I don't think that your scrawny ass clothes are going to fit me." Dean crossed his arms. 

"They're my brothers, he is more your size. I'm sure they will fit." He said holding them out to Dean. Dean takes them and goes Into the bathroom closing the door behind him making sure it was locked this time. 

"Freaking weirdo," Dean mumbled changing into the new clothes. Dean didn't know much about castiels family. Weird ass house, weird ass parents, A weird ass Castiel, and judging by the clothes a weird ass brother too. The pants were a little too short, but Dean wasn't really the one to care about that. Dean walked into the hallway again seeing Castiel. He looked like a damn puppy waiting for his food.

"You're a fucking creep, going into the bathroom while someone takes a shower." Said Dean. Castiel frowns. He didn't think it was weird. It's not like he saw anything or did anything.

"I didn't know, sorry Dean." Cas hung his head afraid Dean would leave for his inappropriate behavior. He pressed on the burn on his hand from earlier. He didn't want Dean to go. He liked Dean and wanted to get to know him better. He would have liked to have a chance to become friends with him. He felt some sort of a connection with him. Dean groaned seeing this pathetic look on Cas' face. 

"Here's a tip, don't do it again if you don't want to get punched in the face. The next guy you try it on won't be as nice as me." Dean smirked patting his shoulder walking past him to go down the stairs. Castiels eyes light up and follows Dean. "What's up with all this weird white shit?" Dean asked plopping down at a seat at the counter. 

"My parents like it." Cas replied simply. He never really thought about it. He had not been over to many peoples houses and didn't know his was any different. 

"Weird ass parents you got there." Dean leaned back into the chair. Castiel couldn't disagree with Dean. They where weird, and he did not like them very much. "Your brother go to our school?" Dean asked breaking the silence again.

"No. He goes to Boarding school." Castiel said getting up going to check on the macaroni he was making for dinner.

"Yeah, weird ass brother you got there." Said Dean. Castiel tenses. He loves his brother and he is not some weird ass brother, as Dean so kindly put it. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"Do not speak about my brother like that." He said anger lingering in his voice. No one spoke bad about his brother, especially people who didn't even know him. Well his parents spoke evil things about his him, but Cas couldn't go against them. He was that smart, at least.

"Sorry," Dean mumbled, "I only know weird ass kids who go to boarding school."

"My parents sent him there. He didn't want to go dean. Stop speaking about him that way!" Cas turned around looking Dean in the eye. Castiel missed his brother and wish he was here, but sadly he is not and Cas will never put up someone talking horrible about him. Dean doesn't know anything.

"Okay, okay, okay. I'm sorry. Sure He is a great guy." Dean said. Castiel relaxed again.

"He is a great guy. He just couldn't follow every rule. My parents sent him away because he was a 'trouble maker'. But that's not true. He was a good brother and friend.....Gabriel....I miss Gabriel." Cas said the last part quietly going back to stirring the macaroni. Dean didn't know a lot about Cas, but he was learning more. He wasn't sure what to do with Cas. He could tell he was sad, but he didn't know how to help him.

"He Sounds great, Cas. Maybe one of these days we can drive up to where he is and visit him. I mean if you trust me enough not to sell your kidneys on our way up." Dean joked about that last part, but was serious about the offer. What better way to bond them being stuck in a car with one another. 

Castiel smiled brightly, but his back was turned to Dean so he couldn't see it. "I think I could take you Dean. Im not that 'scrawny' you know." Said Castiel facing Dean again. Dean laughed. He could beat the crap out of Cas easy. 

"No way in hell you could take me." Dean scoffed shaking his head. Dean could dropkick his ass to China blindfolded. 

"Let's see then." Cas challenged Dean to a fight, well more of a wrestling match. Dean thought this kid was crazy. No way he has a chance. 

****


	3. Chapter Three

"Damnit Cas where did you learn moves like that?" Dean asked lying flat on his back with Castiel standing over him. 

"I took sparing lessons." Castiel shrugged extending his hand to Dean. He did take them. When he was younger he was afraid of the tree scratching on his window was going to try to kill him while he slept. He asked his parents if he could take karate and they let him. He wanted to quit after only a couple of months, but his parents wouldn't let him. Castiel made a commitment and Castiel was going follow through. His parents made him take it for ten years. He started when he was six and ended when he was sixteen. He hated every second, but his parents made him work at it until he skilled enough to not have to take classes anymore. They suggested that Castiel teach classes, but that idea was soon forgotten when they decided to send Gabriel away. 

Dean takes castiels hand and stands up. "Looks like you Weren't lying when you said you beat me." Dean laughed. Castiel smiles at the sound of his laugh. What a sound to make you feel okay again. The timer goes off for the macaroni and Castiel runs into the kitchen tripping halfway there. He could hear Dean laughing excessively. Like it was the funniest thing that has ever happened. Castiel face turns red and he stands up fixing his clothing. "You-you-just fell!" Dean was on the floor laughing hysterically. Honestly Cas didn't know what the big deal was. Dean was laughing so hard he could hardly breathe. All the air sucked out of his lungs by the sight of the awkward man falling down. 

Castiel grumbles going to check on the macaroni. He takes two bowls out and plops the dinner into them. He puts the pan in the sink. Deans laughter still ringing through his ears. He also started laughing, which only made Dean laugh harder. What a mess these two were. After a couple of minutes, when they settle down, Dean stood back up and walked into the kitchen slipping where Cas had. The both started cracking up again. Neither of them have laughed this hard in a long time. It felt good to have their insides aching from laughing too hard. 

"Cas-Cas...I can't...." He laughed trying to stand up. He was standing in a puddle of water where the water must have dripped off of him after his shower. Of course only the stairs and the upstairs were carpet. Hard wood floors just their luck. They take a few deep breaths. "Cas, buddy." He said calming down now. "I just want my macaroni." He started cracking up again and Cas followed. 

"Dean--" he barely got out between the laughs, "just shut up and take the macaroni" he started to control his laughter a bit better than Dean. When the laughter finally died down, Dean received the cold bowl of food. They ate their macaroni, but whenever one of them looked at each other they started laughing again. The finally finished their dinner with all the giggles out. 

"What time your folks be home?" Dean asked putting his dishes in the dishwasher. 

"They're on a trip, they won't be back for at least a week. They left yesterday." He said grabbing a glass of water.

"they just left you alone?" Dean asked surprised. 

"I have to follow rules and if They get back and Find out that I broke a rule, well I know what happens." Castiel said, "would you like a drink?" He asked

"No I'm good." Said Dean. Castiel nods sitting back down. "What happens if you breaks a rule? They send you to boarding school?" Dean asked curious. 

"Gabriel broke the 'no girls in the house without parent permission' rule one too many times. Never the same girl either. So my parents sent him to an all boys boarding school." He said sipping his water. "Usually the punishment matches the crime." 

"Shit dude, sorry." Said Dean looking over at Cas. He was staring into the space ahead of him. 

"It's fine. When does your father want you home?" Cas asked changing the subject.

"He's too drunk to notice if I'm home or not. Sammy is at a school sleepover so he's all taken care of for tonight." Said Dean. "Your folks going to be mad I'm here?" He asked making sure he wouldn't get Cas into trouble.

"As long as we don't drink, do drugs, have a party, trash the house, any illegal activity or disobey your parents wishes then when they get back I tell them that I had a friend over and all is well." Said Cas smiling slightly at Dean. 

"Alright alright so they don't let you do all this shit then why do you smoke? Aren't you afraid your parents will catch you?" Dean asked leaning back in his chair. 

"They know I smoke. And it's not like I smoke everyday, Dean. It's every once in awhile." Said Cas drinking his water again.

"dude my dad would rip me a new one if he ever caught me smoking!" Said Dean surprised Castiels parents would let him near cigarettes. 

"They relieve stress, Dean. As long as I don't smoke in public, in the house or in excessive amounts then Im allowed to." He said yawning.

"Alright then sleepyhead." Said Dean chuckling a little. Castiel wasn't used to this much attention. It wore him out and it wasn't even eight o'clock. "How about you head to bed and I'll head home?" Said Dean standing up. Cas grabbed deans arm.

"Please don't go" he said looking up at Dean with pleading eyes. Dean sat back down laughing to himself. "We can watch a movie and you could sleepover if you ask your father." Cas suggested. 

"I'll be the one that has to pick up sam tomorrow and I don't want to be late." Dean said. Cas looks down. He didn't want his friend to leave. They had a lot of fun together tonight. Dean saw the look on Cas face and he hated seeing his new friend upset. "Are you allowed to sleepover at someone's house?" Dean asked. Castiels face brightened. Dean may be the first person to ask castiel if they would like to come over to their house. 

"I'll have to ask my father and your father would have to agree with it." Said castiel smiling. Dean nods and takes out his phone. 

"You call your dad and I'll call mine, deal?" said Dean. Castiel nods excitedly and takes out his phone calling his father. Dean called his and John didn't care as long as they stayed out of his way. Castiels father agreed to it as long as they were going exactly where he said he was going. No going to party's, no drinking, no drugs, follow orders and be respectful was the gist of castiels father long speech. Castiel agreed to every one of them and Dean had to too. Castiels father also warned Dean that if was a prank on castiel that he would regret it terribly. The way he said it made deans bone rattle. He was not going to try anything with this man looming over him. 

Castiel grabbed some clothes, not knowing what to bring. He locked the doors and all the windows and set the alarms. He handed Dean his washed clothes. They put on their shoes and Dean led Cas to his house. Castiel had never been this exited before. He never had a sleepover with anyone else before. He was either shot down by his parents or the other kids made fun of him and never invited him anywhere. He was excited for something for once.


	4. Chapter Four

When they get to Deans house, John is passed out drunk on the couch with the TV on. "Come on" said Dean walking towards the stairs. Castiel slipped off his shoes and laid them the next to door before heading after Dean. "Dork." Dean whispered under his breath walking him up the stairs. "Movies or video games?" Dean asked closing the door and plopping on the bed. 

Castiel sits next to Dean carefully. "Whatever you prefer." Said Cas placing his bag in his lap. He never played video games before. He would rather watch movies, but he didn't want to ruin this. 

"I'll do whatever I prefer tomorrow." Dean mocked Cas. "Pick or we will just turn on porn." Dean said leaning back smiling to himself. Castiel eyes go big at the word porn. 

"Dean-you-you watch that?" Cas asked his mouth hung open. Dean laughed.

"It's just a joke Cas. Get it together." Said Dean smiling. He didn't watch it. He liked his magazines that he had and when he did watch it it was just anime. 'An art form' as Dean would call it. 

"M-movies, please." Said Cas hugging the bag in his lap. He was starting to feel nervous. Not understanding jokes or sarcasm really was his forte. He didn't want to seem like an idiot. Especially not to Dean. 

"Alright." Said Dean getting up picking a random movie and putting it into the DVD player. "Loosen up dude." Said Dean taking off his shoes and the too short pants. Cas immediately looks down at his feet when Dean took off his pants. "Don't worry this is all you'll be seeing." Dean chuckled going over to his dresser and grabbing a pair of sweats. He pulls them on and sits back down next to Cas still with Gabriel's T-shirt on. Dean could tell something was up with Cas. "What's up with you?" Dean asked for real. He was still awkwardly sitting down and hugging his bag. 

He looked over at Dean, "I just...I just never really...uh well I just never had a sleepover before." He said this quietly. He was embarrassed and his cheeks were turning red. He looked away from Dean so he could try to hide his embarrassment. Dean thought that was sad. He didn't say anything for awhile which only made Cas more uncomfortable. 

"Well this is what we are going to do. I'm gonna go and get some shit to eat. And we are going to watch movies until we pass out. Nothing to be afraid. Okay?" Said Dean sitting up. Cas nods. "Alright let me go find some stuff to eat." Said Dean getting up. He goes downstairs. Cas unzips his bag and takes out long neatly folded pajama pants and matching shirt. he takes off the pants he is wearing and folds them neatly. He slips on his pajama bottoms. He repeats with his shirt. 

Dean comes back up with a bag of chips and a half empty bottle of root beer. "Such a dork." Said Dean when he sees Cas' pajamas. Castiel looks down and shrugs. He has always worn these for pajamas. "Well whatever makes you happy.." Said Dean throwing the ships at Cas. Dean grabs a bean bag and sits down on it. "You can take bed. I'll take floor." Said Dean unscrewing the cap off of the soda.

Cas thought that they would just share a bed, but then again he didn't know much about these things. "Okay." He said opening the bag of chips. Dean turns on the movie and leans back drinking the soda straight from the bottle. Cas didn't approve of such behavior, but this was deans house. 

Cas hands Dean a blanket and a pillow from the bed. And he takes out his own blanket his own blanket from the bag laying down. He only ate a few chips before he finally fell asleep. He didn't even make it through half the movie. Dean could tell he was worn out although he wasn't really sure from what. He took the bag from the sleeping Cas and are most of them himself. Around one Dean got the knock on his door that his did every night. It meant a combination of things. A goodnight, don't make nose, and it's time to wrap whatever the hell you're doing and go to bed. Dean turned off the tv and pulled the blanket over him. He could hear Cas breathing above him on the bed. "Fucking dork." Dean whispered before he closed his eyes. He passed out fairly quickly and the whole house was finally still.

****


	5. Chapter 5

Cas woke up at 6:30 just like he did everyday. He sits up and yawns. He rubs his eyes and grabs his bag. He gets off of the bed softly, careful not to wake up dean. He tiptoes to the bathroom, the cold floor sent a chill through his feet. He close the door carefully and set his bag next to the sink. He brushed his teeth and changed into new clothing. He looked into the mirror and took a deep breath. 

"Be less weird, be more normal." Said Cas into the mirror. That was his goal today. He can't mess what he has up with Dean. After taking his time in the bathroom he goes back to deans room. Dean is still snoring curled up on his bean bag. Castiel smiled a little and placed his bag on the bed. He wanted to get to know Dean more so he decided to look around his room. He found his classic rock Cassettes tapes. Cas had never heard any of these songs. He only listen to classical music....maybe he shouldn't tell Dean that. He looked around more and he found half completed homework assignments. Cas frowned at deans incompleteness. He picked up the papers and found a pencil. He sat at deans cluttered desk and finished his homework. It only took him an hour and Dean hadn't stirred. Perfect. Cas put the papers in a neat pile. In the desk drawer at the bottom Cas had found a secret compartment. He shouldn't look but he felt tempted too. His curiosity won over and he opened it. "Oh dear." Said Cas quickly dropping the magazines with scandalous pictures of women inside it. Dean wakes up from Castiel gasp. He looks over at Cas and sees him eyeing the magazines on the floor. 

"Page 23 is my favorite." Dean chuckled looking at Cas' face. Cas face turns bright red.

"I-I-I'm sorry Dean--I didn't mean to...sorry." Castiel stuttered putting the magazines back in the drawer quickly and closing it. Dean laughs. 

"I'm not mad, man." Said Dean with his hair sticking up in al different directions. "It's funny." Castiel nods, relived Dean wasn't mad at him. He didn't want to talk about this anymore.

"I finished these for you." Castiel said holding up deans papers he completed for him. "And we'll I had to correct most of your work....you should get a tutor." Said Cas placing the papers down on the desk. 

"Hell no man. Ain't no way in hell I'm getting a goddamn tutor." Dean couldn't even believe Cas would suggest something like that! 

"I could be your tutor Dean." Said Cas looking over at Dean. Now maybe Dean could get used to that. 

"Fine." Said Dean checking the clock. It was only 8! "Dude it's eight why the hell are you up?" Said Dean covering his head with his blanket. He wanted to go back asleep.

"I've been up for awhile Dean. And don't you have to pick up Sammy from his sleepover at school?" Cas asked tilting his head to the side. Dean groans when his alarm goes off reminding him he had to get sam soon. Dean slammed the alarm off.

"It's sam to you." Said Dean throwing the blanket off himself. "Why don't you stop doing homework and make some breakfast." Dean was hungry. Castiel nods and goes down to the kitchen. He looked around the kitchen for things he could make. Eggs and toast was what he decided to make. 

After Cas was finished he went upstairs to tell Dean the breakfast was ready. He found him asleep again. Cas sighed and smoke his shoulder gently waking him up. "Dean I made breakfast." Said Cas to the sleepy Dean. Dean groaned. Cas pulls Dean up to his feet.   
"Come on, Dean." He said pulling him downstairs. 

"Smells good, Cas." Said Dean sitting down starting to devour his eggs. Cas sits next to Dean and cute his eggs into pieces before he eats his. 

"I made some for your father and sam as well." Said Cas finishing his breakfast off with a glass of orange juice. 

"Thanks." Said Dean finishing his last swallow before putting the plates in the sink. Dean checks the clock and decides it time to pick up sam. "Let's roll." Said Dean grabbing the keys to his fathers 1967 Chevy Impala. The only thing he couldn't wait to have. 

"Oh, am i coming with?" Cas asked, surprised he invited him along. 

"Yeah pick up sam and we will come back here." He said grabbing a jacket to put over the crumbled slept in t-shirt. He slips another pair of boots over his sweatpants and heads outside. Cas slid his shoes on and follows Dean. Dean hops in the front seat and Cas sits in the back. "Cas....you gonna sit back there?" Dean asked turning to look at him.

"Why wouldn't i?" He asked. He always sat in the back. He couldn't Even think of the last time he sat in font.

"Get your ass up front. You're not a little kid." Said Dean facing the front again putting the key in the ignition. Cas nods going to sit upfront. It would be a lie to say Castiel wasn't a little nervous sitting infront. He sat down in the seat and put on the seatbelt. Dean took off heading for the middle school. Dean pulls out front of the school parks.

"Stay here I'll go get sam." Said Dean after a couple of minutes of waiting and seeing other kids running to their parents car. Castiel nods and deans steps out of the car. He walks into the middle school office. "I'm here to pick up Sam Winchester." Said Dean leaning on the counter his hair still a mess. 

"Sorry we need to talk to his father first." Said the women at the desk looking up at Dean.

"Well I'm here, so where is sam?" Dean glared at the women. How dare she take sam away from Dean. Dean is very protective of sam ever since their mom died. Their dad, John, wasn't really a dad. Dean was the one who took care of sam and well himself too. Their dad work and apparently to him That's all a dad had to do. 

"We need to talk to his father first. We called him." She said with a fake smile.

"Look, bitch, I'll give you one last chance to give me my brother before I start kicking down every door until I find him!" Dean threaten, but is it really a threat if Dean had meant it?

The women's eyes go wide and she stands up, "I think you need to leave now." She said crossing her arms over her chest. 

"Sam!!" Dean called out opening a door, well that one was a closet. He ripped open another door that lead down a small hall way with other doors. Principal office must down here, awesome. "Sammy!!!" Dean yelled trudging down the hallway knocking on every door as he passes them. 

"Dean?" Said sam in the very last room. The principles office. Dean hadn't been here for awhile. Last time he'd been in here was eight grade. Good times. 

Dean pulls the door open to find sam sitting down with his things and a black eye and a busted lip. "Come on Sam I'm taking you home." Said Dean picking up his things. 

"Actually we need to talk to his father first, Dean" The principle spoke up. He remembered Dean well. He was a frequent flier when he was younger.

"Fuck you." Said Dean grabbing Sams hand and pulling him up to his feet. Sam didn't say anything just looked down, embarrassed by his brothers behavior, But he was glad Dean was there. 

"I am going to tell your father about this." Said the principal standing up. 

Dean laughed, "yeah taking my kid brother home is such a bad thing. Go ahead and tell him, see if I give a fuck." Said Dean pulling sam out of there. "Fucking assholes." Dean muttered under his breath flipping off the lady at the desk before he went back to the car with sam. He threw his bags in the trunk. sam slipped in the back seat without saying a word. Dean slammed the trunk closed and got in the driver seat. Dean pulled out fast and drove home in silence. Sam not wanting to talk, Dean too angry to talk, and Castiel confused at what was going on led to one awkward car ride. Dean pulled into the driveway and turned off the car. Sam was ready to jump out before Dean said not to. Dean got out of the driver seat and climbed in back with sam.

"Who beat you up?" Said Dean his voice much softer than it was before. Sam shrugged not saying anything. He turned his head away from Dean. "Was it that jackass, what's his face....Dickian." Said Dean messing the name up on purpose. That always made sam laughed, and it did. Sam nods his head yes. Damian had been giving sam a hard time lately. He shoved him the other day knocking sam to the ground. He hit his head and had to go to the nurse. "Did you fight back like I taught you?" Dean asked putting his arm around sam.

Sam nods a small grin forming on his face. "I got him right in the balls." Dean laughed . Right where Dean had taught him, you have to go where it hurts. 

"So what was all the fuss about taking you home? I thought they were going to call the cops on my ass." Said Dean looking down at sam. 

Sam looks down again, "I-I-i got suspended for hitting him." He said quietly not wanting to look Dean in the eye.

"The hell are you are! You defended yourself from that dick! Did he get suspended?" Dean asked getting angrier. Sam nods.

"I'm sorry I got suspended.....I know you can't stay home with me." Sam said quietly. He didn't want to dissapoint Dean. Never did he want that and he felt like he messed everything up.

"Hey we have the weekend to get them to change their minds. Don't worry about it." Said Dean kissing Sams hair. "Go inside and I'll get your stuff." Said Dean letting sam go. Sam hops out of the car and goes inside. Dean grabs Sams bags from the trunk. He knocked on cas' window telling him he can come out now. Cas had been silent for the whole ride. Observing. He remembered when Gabriel comforter him when no one came to his birthday parties, or if a kid teased him, Or even if his parents had yelled at him. His big brother was always there for him and now he wasn't. He didn't know his number so he couldn't call, but he sent letters, but he never did receive one back. Cas missed him. 

When Dean knocked on the window it broke Cas concentration about his brother and he got out of the car. He followed Dean inside the old house again. Dean threw Sams bag by the door and headed into the kitchen to find sam. Cas slipped off his shoes and followed Dean. Sam was eating the cold breakfast and Dean was Making an ice pack for Sams eye. 

"Who are you?" Sam asked looking at Cas. He never seen him before. 

"His name is Cas and he's gonna teach you how to kick ass better than I can." Said Dean handing sam his bag of ice wrapped in a towel. Cas looks surprised at Dean. He didn't know he was doing this, but if that's what Dean wanted the he would.

"Are you going to teach me how to punch someone so hard that they get knocked out?" Sam asked holding the ice pack to his eye. 

"No-I-I don't really punch people. It's more along the lines of....wrestling." Said Cas folding his hands on the counter. 

Sam looks at Dean making sure he was serious. Dean nods smiling. "Okay that'll be cool." Said sam. Cas nods smiling to himself. Cas found this family kind. He liked this small family and felt like he fit in. Even if he acted differently from sam and Dean he felt like he would be okay here.

****


	6. Chapter Six

Cas helped Dean with his homework for Monday before going back home after lunch. He wasn't allowed to have friends over on Sunday. That was homework and chore day and father said he had to b/e back home by two on Saturday. He also taught some basic sparing techniques to Sam. He promised to teach him more the next time he went over to deans. He probably won't be allowed to go back over Until Friday night.

Dean had told his dad what happened with Sam being suspended from school and John said he would take care of it. And he did. He went to the school and told them he would sue them for refusing to let his son go and suspending sam for defending himself. Then suddenly the school had a change of heart and removed Sams suspension. Although John may not have been a very good father, he did try. He worked and drank a lot, but that didn't mean he didn't care. John returned home and told sam the good news. Sam and Dean were both happy. Dean wouldn't let sam stay by himself for a week so he would have had to stay home with him and Dean would just fall farther behind in school.

Dean spent the rest of his weekend hanging out with sam. Playing video games and eating junk. Football season ended for him so it's not like he had much to do. He wished Cas could hang out, but his parents and their stupid rules got in the way. Dean wasn't a big fan of rules. He did whatever the hell he thought was right. Not what some asshole told him to do.

On Monday his father went to work early and Dean walked sam to school like he did everyday. "Have a good day, bitch" said Dean smiling.

"You too, jerk" sam replied. It was practically like second nature to him. That was sam and deans thing and no one could take that little special thing away from them. Sam ran off to school and Dean started heading towards his high school. He went to his locker and grabs his stuff for first period. When he closed his locker he found Cas standing right next to him. Dean will admit it was a little creepy like he just appeared there, but he didn't really care.

"We have math together." Said Cas smiling. It felt good to see Dean again. And Dean felt the same way.

Dean groaned at the sound of math, but for the first time basically all year he actually did his homework. So that was a plus. Dean walked to class with Cas. Castiel sat upfront as usual, Dean hesitated before he sat next to Cas. The teacher didn't like him and Dean didn't like the teacher. As long as Dean didn't cause trouble the teacher would keep his grade at least a D And that was fine by Dean. When the teacher came around to collect their homework he was surprised that Dean actually had his.

"I'm gonna have to frame this." He said taking the papers and setting them down at his desk. The rest of math class was boring and so was the class after that and the class after that. Dean always wondered how the school expected him to learn when all he wanted to do was jump out the window. Today was better than most days. He could lean over and pester Cas about something or say something about sex and have his face scrunch in a ball. It was amusing.

Dean grabbed his lunch out of his locker and sat down at his normal lunch table with the people he tolerated or that sucked him off sometimes. He sat back in his chair and waited for Cas to come through the cafeteria. When he did Dean waved him over to their table. Castiel just stood in the middle of the cafeteria and shook his head. He didn't like the people Dean was sitting with. They usually made fun of him or sometimes even beat him up after school. He hardly ever fought back. He was just scared. Maybe he was afraid the darkness inside of him would finally consume him. He preferred not to think about it.

Dean got up from the table and walked over to him. "Come on." Said Dean wondering what the problem was. Castiel just stood there and shook his head. He wanted to go somewhere else. He hardly ever ate in the cafeteria usually the librarian lets him eat In the library because she felt bad for him. Dean could see Cas practically shaking. He never really remembered seeing him in the cafeteria before, he guessed Cas was just afraid of crowds. Cas was doing a lot for him so he guessed he would sit and have a lunch with him, "alright Cas where do you want to eat?" Dean asked

"Library." He said quietly. Dean nods going back to his table grabbing his lunch. He got crap for ditching them for what they called cad, 'the mute fag'. He barely ever spoke in school. Cas never really had one to talk to. Dean told them to shove it where the sun doesn't shine and grabbed his bag and headed back to Cas. He grabbed his arm and took him to the library where Cas started to relax more.

"Hello mrs. Howl." Said cas sitting down at a table with Dean sitting next to him. "This is my friend, Dean" he said smiling taking out his sandwich.

"Well any friend of Cas is a friend of mine," she said smiling softly. She was an older women with her hair pinned back in a bun. Dean smiled at her and then stuffed his face his with his sandwich. "I'll be back in a minute Castiel." She said getting up and leaving the library.

Dean finished his bite before he started talking. "Don't listen to those fuckwads. They don't know a damn thing." Said Dean looking over at Cas.

A slight smile comes acoss Cas' face. "I don't." He said taking another bite. They finish their lunch. Mrs. Howl mostly told them  
funny stories. Dean didn't really know if they were all true or not but didn't really care. She was pretty cool for a librarian.

After school Dean and Cas did their homework in the library and Cas helped Dean study for their history test in two days. Dean needed a lot of help. This wasn't going to be easy. When Cas returned home he found his parents sitting in the living room. He was surprised they were home so early.

"You're home late, Castiel." Said his mother sitting on the couch in the living room.

"I was helping my friend study. I did most of my homework with him." Said Castiel taking off his shoes.

"Is this the same friend that you stayed over at his house?" He father asked sitting next to his mother. Castiel nods. "Are you going to be helping him more often?" he asked

"I would like too. He needs the help and because he is my friend." Cas said.

They both nod and Cas went up to his room to finish his homework.

****


	7. Chapter Seven

Dean and Cas became closer over the coming months. Dean stopped hanging out with everyone mostly because they all picked on Cas. Cas was even beaten up again, but this time he fought back because Dean told him to. They never try to hurt him again considering Cas beat them pretty clearly. Dean also stuck up for Cas threatening to bash a  
couple faces in if they ever talk about Cas that way again. Soon the rumors were only whispered behind their backs, but honestly they could care less. Deans grade went up pretty drastically, he got them to spell ACDC, the D was in art. and Cas even taught sam enough to take down his bully. Life was good. Cas still followed every of his parents rules to a T and Dean was kind of annoyed about that. Cas needed to live his own life, not his parents life. Deans still had a crush on Cas. He liked Cas in that way, but he wasn't sure if Cas liked him back. Dean just buried his feelings not wanting to lose his friend.  
It's the beginning of summer and Cas finally invites Dean over to his house when his parents are home. Cas didn't want Dean to meet his parents because he thought his parents would scare him off. His parents could be very scary and harsh.

"Hello mrs. And mr. Novack. It's nice to meet you." Said Dean extending his hand to them. They each shake deans hand. Dean comes inside and takes off his shoes. Cas made sure he brought clean shoes today. Cas was standing behind his parents looking like a nervous wreck. Dean winked at Cas which only made Cas more nervous.

"We have heard a lot about you Dean." Said mr.novack, "please have a seat." He gestured to the couch. Dean and Cas sat on one couch next to each other. Cas fidgets with his hands.

"It's fine, calm down." Dean whispered to Cas. Cas would get like this sometimes and Dean always had to reassure him he was fine.

"How did you start becoming friends? Castiel doesn't seem like the type of person to be your friend." Mr. Novak asked. Cas was biting this inside of his cheeks already.

"Uh well I was having a bad day and Cas asked me if I wanted to come over to his house and we I dunno we just hung out after that." Said Dean shrugging. Cas' parents asked Dean a lot of questions. It was more like an interview than a conversation. They finally released them into Cas' room after awhile.

"Please don't let my parents stop you from being my friend." Cas blurted out when they were alone in Cas' room. His teeth had blood on them from biting his cheeks so hard. His mouth was raw.

"Damnit Cas." Said Dean going over to him. "I don't give a fuck about your parents. Open your mouth." Dean demanded. Cas shook his head. He didn't want Dean to see what he did to himself. "Open or I'll open it." Dean said sternly. Castiel opens his mouth showing the blood on teeth. Dean sighed grabbing a water bottle from Cas' desk. "Drink." He said handing the water bottle to Cas. Cas drank the water until he couldn't taste the blood in his mouth.

"Stop hurting yourself. First it was the burns on your arms. Scratching yourself. They never helped you. They don't help you. I need you man. I ain't leaving you, I promise." Said Dean putting his hands on Cas' shoulders.

"G-Gabriel said he wasn't leaving......." Said Cas looking down away from Dean. Dean pulled Cas into a hug kissed the top of his head.

"I told you we would go find your brother. You just gotta give me the when and I'll make it happen." Dean said into Cas' hair. Cas was a year younger then Dean, but he skipped a grade when he was younger. Gabriel had just finished 11th grade, Cas hoped. He sent letters to Gabriel, but he only ever got one letter back. He thinks his parents  
takes Gabriel's letters and hide them so Cas can't find them. He hated his parents.

Dean hugged Castiel for a long time. Cas calmed down and he accidentally said I love you to Dean. It was barely audible and muffled info deans shirt, but Dean sworn he heard him say it. And the was good enough for Dean.

Once Cas pulled away from Dean, Cas suggested they watch movies on his computer. Sounded fine to Dean. They would always pause the movie and make fun of the characters or yell at them. You know how it goes. Sam, Dean, and Cas all got really into a paranormal TV show called ghost facers. They loved that show. It was safe to call them obsessed.  
Sometimes they would even watch horrible soap operas and turn off the sound and make up their own words to the plot. Thats just what they did and they had fun with it. While Cas pulled out his laptop Dean put  
on his matching pajamas. He got them to make fun of Cas, but Cas thought it was the best thing. After Cas set up his computer Dean laid down on the neatly made bed. Cas put on his pajamas that matched deans. Cas always tried to hide the burns on his arms, but Dean knew they were there and he didn't care. He was still Cas.

"I'll take the floor." Said Cas sitting next to the bed.

"You're not going to be able to watch the movie down there man." Said Dean moving over on the bed. He wouldn't mind if Cas slept next to him and neither did Cas. Without a second thought he climbed on the bed next to Dean. Dean pressed play on the screen and it was time to binge watch ghost facers.

After Cas fell asleep Dean closed the computer and put it to the side. Cas was curled up next to Dean. Dean smiled wrapping his arm around Cas. "Goodnight." He whispered before falling asleep.

The next morning Dean woke up to find Cas on top of him. He smiled. He wished he could kiss him right now. He wished they were alone. He wished too many things that Cas wouldn't want. "God I love you Cas" Dean said out loud. He didn't think Cas was awake, but he was.

Cas smiles and turns to look at Dean. "I love you too dean." He smiled. Deans face turned red. He didn't even think he said it out loud. God he was kicking himself now. Dean must've looked like some fumbling idiot. "Something wrong Dean?" Cas asked. Dean swallowed and shook his head.

"Nope, all good." Maybe he didn't even say it. Or maybe Castiel didn't know what he meant by it. He wasn't the most in tune with these types of things. "Are your parents home?" Dean asked changing the subject.

"They leave for work at 8." He said looking over at his clock on his desk. It was 8:30. "So no they are not at the moment." He said. Cas felt at home when he was with Dean. He didn't really know how he felt about him, but he did love Dean. Not the same way he loved Gabriel, but he knew that he loved him. When he heard Dean said 'I love you' he  
knew that Dean wouldn't leave him because if he felt the same way that cas felt toward dean then he knew he would never leave.

"When do you want to see your brother?" Dean asked after a couple of minutes of silence.

"I'll have to ask my parents...." He was cut off by Dean.

"No. Your parents are just going to say no. Tell me when you want to go and I'll make it happen." Said Dean

"As soon as possible. They keep him over the summer too....Gabriel must hate it so much there." Castiel trailed off blanking out, thinking about his brother. Sometimes he would lock himself up inside of himself. Dean would have to snap him out of it and bring him back down to earth again, he didn't mind though. He loved pretty much everything about Cas and that was who he was and he loved that.

"Hey." Said Dean shaking him a bit, "when are your parents going out of town again?" He asked

"In two weeks I think." Cas replied snapping back into reality before he slipped too far.

"Then we will go see your brother in two weeks." Said Dean. Castiel smiled. He was excited, but also nervous. He was pretty sure his parents would kill him when he returned home. Literally kill him.


	8. Chapter Eight

Dean had plans for Cas to come to his house while his parents were away and they would drive up to the boarding school Gabriel was at. John said he didn't care if Dean and Cas went. It was all set. It would only take Dean a day to drive up there. Cas had made Gabriel's favorite cookies. It's been a long time since he seen his brother. Too long. He sent letters to him every week, but he never received one back. Except for that one time. Gabriel said Cas had to promise not to get into trouble while he wasn't there. He couldn't protect him if he had. Cas used to always break the rules when he was younger, but Gabriel usually took the blame so Cas wouldn't get in trouble. Cas parents were horrible people. They wouldn't just ground their children or take away their phones, they would lock them in dark closets for two days. If you didn't take your shoes off at the door they would take away your shoes and make you walk around in the woods. Cas never told Dean what his parents did to him, he would freak out and it wouldn't end well. He knew his parents would do something horrible to him, but he needed to see Gabriel.

The only other person that knew how Dean felt about Cas was sam. Dean never told, but he wasn't blind. He could see it.

"When are you going to kiss him already?" Sam asked after one day after Cas left. "I mean he is practically your boyfriend already."

"Shut up." Said Dean his hand covering the boys face pushing him away.  
Dean was blushing and sam could tell he liked Cas.

"Come on Dean you can tell me. I'm not a blabber mouth." Said sam chasing Dean up the stairs. Dean groaned trudging into his room. Did he really need his little brother involved? Maybe he would feel better if someone knew....

Sam followed Dean into his room. "Dean....you used to tell me everything. Come on." He said sitting down on deans bed. Dean wouldn't say everything, but he did share a great deal with sam.

"Alright alright, but if you breathe another word of this I will personally beat the living shit out of you? Understand?" It was an empty threat, but Dean was filled with those. Sam nods smiling from ear to ear.

"I do....i don't know maybe...." Dean trailed off not wanting to continue.

"Stop it. You do know. I see the way you look at Cas. Always staring at each other when one of you walks into the room before you even say hello. I might be only 12, but I'm not stupid." Sam liked to observe things. Always watching, not always talking though.

Dean sighed running his hand through his hair. "I'm in deep sam." Said Dean looking over at him. Sam wanted to jump and say 'I KNEW IT', but he could see it wasn't a game to Dean. It was serious, something to handle with care. Sam knew Cas was an awkward person and many situations turned a very awkward corner right down awkward lane with him. Dean loved that though. Always laughing. It was just in the bond they shared.

"I'm pretty sure Cas feels the same way about you." Said Sam trying to comfort Dean who was now sitting on the bed with his face in his hands. "I don't think it's one sided Dean....." Sam read a lot of books. Always pulling out the sappy crap when Dean was in trouble.  
Dean made fun of him for it, but He appreciated the effort.

Dean smiled through his hands. The thought of Cas would make anyone chuckle. Dean sprang up and started tickling sam. The boy was soon laughing endlessly underneath Dean. Trying to set himself free, but he never actually succeeded. "Dean!" He managed to get out. Dean let him up, but he was still hugging him tightly.

"Thank you Sammy." Dean whispered kissing the top of his head. Sam melted into his big brothers arm. A place that made him feel everything would be okay. It was a comforting protection.

"I'm taking cas to see his brother in a couple of days. Probably won't be back until Tuesday night though." Said Dean, "I want you to stay over at Bobby's until I get back. Dad won't be home and I can't leave you alone for That long." Bobby was pretty much another father to them. He even met Cas. John tried, but it's hard being a single father. never home enough, too drunk, but he had his moments as a father. Dean loved him, mostly. When he was yelling at sam all Dean wanted to do was punch him in the face. Sam enjoyed bobby. He drank, but he worked from home. He didn't have a tv, but he had s lot of interesting books...some where a little creepy. Sam agreed and Dean let go of him Dean felt better now that sam knew.


	9. Chapter Nine

"Alright Cas, let's roll." Said Dean putting their bags in the trunk and shutting it. Cas gets in the passenger with a plate of cookies. They were Gabriel's favorite. Dean got in the driver seat and popped in his cassette tape. "House rule Cas, driver picks the music shotgun shuts his cakehole" said Dean staring the car beginning a long drive. As they drove Dean sang along to all the songs. He wasn't the best singer, but Cas didn't think he cared. Cas even joined in on a couple songs. He never really listen the these songs, but it was a good change. When it was starting to get dark Cas started to get worried. He wasn't sure what his parents were going to do to him or how Gabriel would react when he saw him. Dean was sure that his parents wouldn't find out, but he knew they would.

Cas pulled out his pack of cigarettes. He hadn't smoked one since he met Dean. He didn't need to, but he couldn't get his nerves under control. "May I?" Cas asked holding up his cigarette. Dean looked over at Cas and sighed.

"One. Don't need my car to smell like your stale ass cigarettes." He said putting his eyes back on the road. Castiel rolled down the window and took out his lighter. He lit his cigarette and put it to his mouth. It was cold outside. Dean thought it was too cold to have the windows open, but Cas wanted to smoke his cigarette. He must've been pretty stressed out if he was smoking. Castiel wasn't saying much. He just kept staring out the window.

"Little cold to have the windows open, don't you think?" Dean said looking over at Cas. Cas shrugged.

"I think it's nice." He said finishing his cigarette throwing it out the window. He didn't know if  
he was allowed to do that, but it was too late to now. Cas rolled the window up almost to the top. He leaned back in his seat and took off his coat and put it over top of him. Once he shut his eyes he fell asleep quickly.

When Castiel awoke the sun was shining through the car. They were parked on the side of the deserted road. Dean was asleep with his arms folded over his chest. Cas need to stretch his legs. He opened the car door quietly and climbed out. We walked for a little. He was surrounded by corn fields and the sun was jut coming up over the horizon. It was really nice, he wished Dean was up to walk with him. After about a half an hour he walked back to the car. "Dean." He shook his shoulder lightly. Dean eyes open and he looked at Cas.

"Wanna start driving again?" He asked yawning stretching his arms.

"We could walk together. It's quite beautiful outside." Said Cas smiling.

"Alright, but just for a bit." Said Dean getting out of the car locking the doors. He cracked his back and shook his legs out.

"this way." Said Cas heading back the way he went before. Dean followed him along the dirt road. It was pretty nice outside. Not too cold not too hot, just nice. After walking for a couple minutes Cas grabbed deans hands. Dean looked down and smiled.

"Hey Cas....watcha doing?" Dean asked still holding onto his hand.

"They do this in the movies. Don't they?" Cas asked looking at Dean tilting his head. That damn head tilt drove Dean crazy every time. Cas hair was a mess and Dean just wanted to kiss him, but he couldn't do that.

"Yeah Cas, they do this in the movies." While they walked Dean swung their hands a little. Sometimes to make Cas laugh he would swing his arm faster.

They walked until they reached a tree with a swing tied on it. It was in the shade surrounded by cornfields. Probably some farm kids swing, but Castiel ran too it like he was a little kid. Without any hesitation he sat on the swing and started swinging. He laughed while he swung. He and Gabriel used to do this as little kids until their father tore down the swing when Cas accidentally fell off and broke his arm because of it.

Dean smiled and sat down leaning up against the tree. "Ten minutes then we have to head back." Dean said. Castiel nodded and slowed down the swing. After a few minutes he got off and sat next to Dean. He leaned his head on his shoulder and looked at the sun. Dean wrapped his arm around Cas and pulled him close. It was perfect.


	10. Chapter Ten

Dean drove for a couple more hours until they reached the campus Gabriel was at. Castiel seemed much more happier this round. He was more talkative and he sang along with Dean to most of the songs. He was learning to love the rules of the road.

It was a pretty barren campus, considering it was summer and most boys went home. There were two kids walking around so Dean decided to ask them if they knew Gabriel Novak.

"Hell yeah we do!" Said one of the boys who name was josh.

"That guy is hilarious. Pulling some shit crazy pranks." The other boy named aiden explained. He was like a legend at the school, but that's all people knew about him. To Cas that sounded like Gabriel. Gabriel was quite a trickster. His parents would punish him often when he broke a rule, but if anything that only fueled Gabriel desire to pull more pranks. Cas would sometimes help Gabriel with his shenanigans, but he never let his little brother Cas get in to trouble for that.

"Dudes dorm is the last one down the hall. Can't miss it." Said josh pointing them towards the building. Dean and Cas thanked them both and headed into the dorm. They headed down the hall. Cas could hear his hart beating. His hands were sweaty and he was gripping the cookie plate tightly.

"You want to knock on the door?" Dean asked standing behind Cas. He could tell he was nervous so he out his hand on his back to try and calm him down. It worked. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door. They could hear Gabriel mumbling something sounding like he just got out of bed. He threw on a pair of sweatpants and a tie-dyed color shirt before answering the door. Castiel never saw Gabriel happier.

"Hey little brother." Gabriel smiled from ear to ear. He practically attacked Castiel with a hug. He almost collapsed under his weight. Castiel buried his head in Gabriel's neck. He missed him so much. After a couple of minutes Gabriel finally spoke. "Are you holding cookies?" He asked letting Cas go.

"Monster cookies. Your favorite." Cas smiled holding the plate out for him.

"Hell yeah!" He took the plate from his hands and removed the covering. A dozen cookies the size of his hand with giant rainbow m&ms inside of them were revealed. To Gabriel the only thing that would make this moment better if he had a hot girl lying on his bed. He would take this though. The best moment he had in two years. Gabriel set the cookies down on his bed and put His arm around Cas neck messing up his hair like when he did when they were younger. Castiel laughed struggling to get out of his grip, but this was no use though. Dean smiled. Anytime he saw the light glow in cas' eye he couldn't help, but smile. He was happy. Maybe the happiest Dean seen him. He could never imagine not being able to see sam for two years. That would kill him.

Gabriel let go of Cas and turned his attention towards Dean. He still kept his arm around Cas's shoulders though. "So you must be Cas's boyfriend......Dean." Said Gabriel.

Dean laughed, "I wouldn't say boyfriend......" He said scratching the  
back of his neck.

"Oh really?" Said Gabriel going to his desk pulling out a shoebox. He opens the lid and it was filled from Cas's letter he sent to Gabriel every week. "Every single one talks about you. Cas pretty much sent me a novel on Dean -Apple green eyed -winchester ." Said Gabriel closing the shoebox and tossing it to Dean. Dean caught it. Maybe Cas did feel the same way. He grabbed a couple letters and stuffed them in his  
jacket. He would read them later. "You look sweeter in person" he said inspecting dean.

"You got my letters?" Cas asked smiling

"Yeah, but you never got mine." Said Gabriel, "chuck and Ann threw them away. They told me to stop writing them cause you never got them." He was talking about his parents, but those people weren't his parents anymore. Not after what they did to him as a child and especially now. The hell with 'em. Gabriel sat down on his cluttered bed and grabbed a cookie. "Never said that you planned on coming down here." He said crumbs flying out of his mouth.

"I always hoped you got my letters.....I wanted to surprise you." He said sitting down next to him. Gabriel wrapped his arm around Cas again. He was pretty sure he missed him more than anything.

"I heard a lot about you Gabriel....." Dean was cut off by Gabriel.

"Gabe, please." He said eating another cookie.

"Well, gabe, it's just nice to finally meet you. Cas always goes on about you and-." He said

"I think you guys should just hookup already." Gabe said in between bites of his cookies.

"What do you mean?" Cas asked not understanding what he meant.

"Cas just-" Dean sighed

"Just fuck each other or something. God Cas I wanted to say that to you for so long. Just kiss the boy for god sakes before I go out of my mind." Gabriel said looking over at Cas.

"Is that what best friends do?" Cas asked gabe. Cas just didn't know what he was supposed to do. He never had any friends except for Dean and gabe. He has a hard time forming relationships, he was Lost and not sure what he was feeling.

"No--Cas...don't let your brother talk you into somethin you ain't ready for." Dean said glaring at gabe. That's not how he wanted it to go down. He had to be sure Cas was ready for that kind of relationship. Hell Dean didn't know If he was even ready. It's not like he had a lot of serous relationships under his belt.

 

"Alright alright fine fine I'll keep my opinions to myself, lover boy." Gabe said putting his hands up. Dean rolled his eyes.

"I'm gonna go get our bags from the car." Said Dean heading out of the room.

Gabe puts his arm around Cas again. "Things been Better with Dean around right?" He asked

"He helps me. He makes everything better." Cas smiled. He was with his two favorite people In the world. Nothing could get better than this.

"Chuck and Ann are going to fucking kill you for coming here you know that right?" Said gabe smiling dropping. He knew better than anyone what their parents could and would do. They were like a tornado and Cas drove right in front of them.

He nods hugging gabe. He tried not to think about it. He just wanted to be with his brother. He didn't even want to leave him again. Cas didn't cry often, but he did then. He didn't want to leave him again. He couldn't, he needed his brother and his parents were going to kill him when he got home. It was all too much for him. Gabe pulled him into his lap and hugged him tighter.

"Hey I'll go back with you. Don't worry nothing is going to happen to you." He said rubbing his back. Cas just cried harder. He knew Gabriel couldn't go back with him and he knew his parents would probably punish him and that's the way it would go. He just had to accept it.

Dean came back with their bags to a sobbing Cas in Gabriel's arm. Dean never saw Cas cry before. It broke his heart. He wanted to hold him until everything was okay again. He set the bags down on the ground and sat on the bed next to him. He started humming a song his mother sang to him when he went to sleep, Hey Jude by the Beetles. It calmed cas down until he was just a ball of sniffles. He fell asleep soon and gabe laid him down on the bed crawling next to him. He couldn't stand seeing his brother like this.

Dean crouched down next to Cas and pushed the hair out of his face wiping away his tears. "If Cas wants to stay here I won't stop him..." Dean said wiping away his own tears with the back of his hand. Seeing Cas like this was killing him. He didn't deserve this. He deserved so much more.

"No he is going to go back home. I have to stay here and after I finish school I'll come home and take Cas. You have to make sure nothing bad happens to him. You gotta make sure he doesn't get hurt." Said gabe hugging him. "I'll send the letters to your address and you give them to Cas. I'll give you and Cas my number, but Cas will need another phone so our parents don't know anything." Said gabe looking down. He wanted so badly to just take Cas away from everything and give him a good, quiet life or at least away from their parents. If he went home now though there would just be more trouble. Cas needed to go home and stand up to his parents. It had to be done no matter how much they didn't like it. Dean nods kissing Cas forehead. He would protect him.


	11. Chapter Eleven

When Cas woke up he was better. Gabriel explained what was going to happen and Castiel felt better. Gabe wanted to make the most out of this weekend. They played childish jokes on the other students and even some faculty. They all felt better. When it was time to go home Cas had a hard time letting go of Gabriel, literally. He hugged him tightly not wanting to go back home. He begged Dean if they could stay longer but Dean had to say no. He didn't want to have to say that, but they needed to be home before Cas's parents got home.

"Don't make me go, Dean." Cas said tears in his eyes hugging gabe even tighter.

"Come on little brother, it'll be okay. We will write, call, text. It'll be okay" he said trying to break free from Cas, but Cas was strong. He hated doing this. It hurt to see Cas suffering so much. Dean ended up having to pry Cas off of him. They said their goodbyes and Cas climbed into the back seat crying into his rolled up jacket. He didn't want to leave his brother, not again. Dean didn't try to comfort him this time. He needed to cry this one out. Dean turned on soft music and began their drive back home.

Gabriel cried too. After they left he cried for hours. What was he doing to his little brother? How could he force him back to his parents? He knew they would hurt him and he just let it happened. He wanted to go back, keep him here forever. At the same time he knew he did the right thing, but at that moment he just wanted to do stupid stuff with his brother. He wanted to go back and tell him he could stay here. They could run away together, just playing jokes and getting into trouble. He only cried harder until he passed out. In a pool of his tears. His pillow was soaked. His eyes puffy his throat sore. He could only imagined how Cas felt.

Cas was inconsolable for most of the car ride. He went to sobs, to sniffles, to light crying and repeating. He finally fell asleep in the backseat. He couldn't see, but tears were falling down deans cheeks too. Hearing him cry and not being able to do anything about him feel like a failure. Like he let him down. He was a failure in his eyes. To Cas's eyes though Dean was a strong, kind hearted, loving person. Failure, mistake, useless, fuck up never once came to mid when he thought of Dean. He owes everything to Dean, but he owes Dean a thank you the most. Taking him to see Gabriel was the best thing that had happened to him even though it was painful to leave. He loved his brother and was grateful he got the chance to see him. He realized this towards the end of the car ride. He finally stopped crying and sat up. Puffy eyes, sore throat, headache. But all the same he smiled. Not a big smile, or a small smile, just a smile. He thanked Dean. He thanked him over and over and over again. When he got home he would write to Gabriel saying that he wasn't as sad as he was. He was... ..better. Not okay, but better. Dean felt relived after Cas said this. Of course he said he didn't need to be thanked. But Cas still thanked him over and over.

When they returned to Cas's house Dean asked him if he wanted him to stay over. Cas simply shook his head and explained how he needed to be alone for awhile. Dean hugged him goodbye and went to go pick up his littler brother from Bobbys.

Cas went to his room and wrote to Gabriel right away. He also charged his second phone Gabriel gave him so they could talk. He had to keep reminding himself it would be okay. A couple hours after Cas came home his parents came home and called Cas down immediately. He started shaking as he walked down the steps. He sat down in the living room looking down at his feet. He refused to look up for he was guilty of seeing Gabriel. Apparently the school called his parents and told them that two boys were causing trouble with Gabriel. His parents started yelling at him. He wasn't really sure what they were saying, but he was sure it was a load of bull shit. His father all the sudden came rushing towards him. What's in his hand? A bat? A pole? Everything went dark for Castiel.


	12. Chapter Twelve

Cas woke up in a dark room. His head hurt. When he went to hold his head he realized his arm and hand hurt too. Soon he could feel pain in every inch of his body. He was bleeding from his head, face, arms, and chest. He coughed up blood and was barely able to breathe. He felt like everything was broken. He was cold, alone, scared, and broken.

When he tried to move he only cried in pain. It was no use. He kept choking on the blood in his throat. It stained his cracked lips and pale fingers. He grew very tired and weak. He tried to call out, but only blood came up. He figured out he was in Gabriel's room. Well his closet to be exact. He didn't have the fight anymore. He was just tired. But he remembered Dean and Gabriel and how much they loved him and he tried to keep his eyes open, but they soon felt like a dam that was about to burst. And they did burst. Darkness flooding his mind.

Dean had been calling and texting Cas to see if he was alright. He wanted to make sure he was okay. His phone went straight to voicemail each time and Dean was becoming nervous. Tomorrow. Tomorrow he would check on him and make sure he is okay. Of course Cas was okay though. He just needed time to be alone. Everyone needed that once in awhile.

Dean had a hard time sleeping that night. He was checking his phone constantly. Only Cas was racing through his mind. Tossed and turned all night. His alarm went off at 6:30, the time Cas always woke up. He checked his phone again. Nothing. He decided to go over there at 8. He didn't care if looked like he was clingy. He didn't care. He needed to Cas was doing okay. He was very upset yesterday, and he needed to know about Cas. He rolled out of bed at seven. He took a shower and ate breakfast. He didn't care that it was only 7:30 he went to Cas's house anyways.

Cas had visions of when he was younger playing with Gabriel. Happy thoughts. Didn't this happen before you died? Cas couldn't really think straight right now. He could hear his parents downstairs. He wanted to run, yell, scream, fight, but he is powerless. A broken body locked in a paradise inside his mind. He heard a new voice. Dean. He heard Dean. His eye opened slightly. Blood was dried on his eyelids. Never have he felt so empty. Like he could float away. His mind did, but his body couldn't. An old broken record. Maybe it was his time to go, but when he heard Dean he thought differently. Dean was so close. He needed him now more than ever. He heard a crash and bang before the darkness inside of him took over again. A prisoner of his own mind again. 

****

"Is Cas home?" Dean asked the novaks. The both shook their head. They were lying, Cas was here and he knew it. "Where is Cas?!" Dean grew angrier. Nobody took his Cas away form him.

"He is grounded, Dean Winchester. After your little stunt you two pulled." Mr. Novak said closing the door on Dean. Dean shoved it back open coming inside.

"I wanna see Cas now!" He yelled. He would fight them if he had to. He wouldn't even hesitate.

"You're not allowed to see him again, ever." Mrs. Novak piped up. Dean face was filled with rage. He was going to see Cas now. Dean growled and pushed pass the two parents. Mrs. Novak grabbed Dean while mr. Novak punched Dean in the face. Dean laughed pulling his arm away from mrs. Novak and started wailing on mr. Novak. He had enough, he was done. Once mr. Novak became unconscious he turned around for mrs. Novak, but she was gone. Dean didn't think twice about her before marching up the stairs to find Cas.

"Cas?!" Dean yelled through the hall ways. He could hear a noise in the room at the end of the hall. It sounded like someone was drowning. The door was locked so Dean kicked it down. He turned on the light and he could see blood seeping out of the closet onto the the carpet. The closet door was locked. Dean tried to break it off with his bare hands, but he couldn't. He broke the chair at the desk and used the leg of it to pry the lock off. When the door swung opened Dean could see the badly beaten Cas on the floor. Drowning in his own blood. He dropped to his knees and let out a shaky Cas. He pulled him into his lap. Dean thought he was dead, but he was practically Dead. He could hear him breathing barely. He pulled out his phone and dialed 911 with numb fingers. He sat there with Cas until the ambulance came. The two novaks were gone when the police showed up. Dean couldn't speak. They had to take him to the hospital in the same ambulance as Cas or he would start screaming for him.

Castiel was brutally beaten with a metal baseball bat. He suffered multiple concussions, multiple rib fractures and broken rips, one of his arms were broken. Mostly likely from trying to cover his head while his father beat him with a bat. He had internal bleeding, a punctured lung, and severe blood loss. The doctors were not optimistic about his chances of recovering. Dean was numb to everything. He sat down in a chair and blocked out everything. He didn't care that his shirt was soaked with castiels blood. All he could think about was how this was his fault. He got Cas killed. He was the one that did this. That he could never be with Cas the way he wanted to. He lost his chance to tell him how he felt. The world was crashing down on him and he never felt so alone. He heard Sams voice. He didn't know what he was saying that just that he was there. His father was there too. Dean looked over at them tears painted his face. Sam was still in his pajamas and his hair was a mess. His father in the same clothing he was in last night. John sat next to him and put his hand on deans shoulder.

"it's not your fault, son" was all he said. He recognized the look on deans face and he knew he was blaming himself for what happened. That's what he did whem marry died and now Dean was. Dean hugged his father sobbing into his chest. He just held him. He knew he was a pretty crappy father, but he knew this was all he could do. Dean stopped crying, but his father still held him.

The doctor came over and he wanted to check on Dean to make sure he was okay. John let him take his son into an exam room. He had no life threatening injuries. All he had was a bloody nose from Mr. Novak punching him. He also had bruised knuckles from punching Mr.Novak. Dean was traumatized. He suffered extreme emotional distress. The doctor wanted to keep him under a 72 hour psychiatric hold to make sure he was okay. John agreed to it as long as he could stay he and sam could stay with Dean. The doctor said it was okay and sam and John went into deans hospital room. Dean was in scrubs because his other clothing was drenched with blood. He just laid in bed staring at the wall. Sam climbed up next to him trying the best he could to comfort Dean.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

The doctors preformed multiple surgeries on Castiel. There were many times where the doctors thought they lost him, but Castiel was strong. His body wouldn't let him give up, not yet. He was in a coma though. His body had suffered a tremendous amount of trauma and he wasn't out of the clear yet.

While Cas was in his surgeries, Dean became more responsive. While his father went home to gather some clothes Dean called Gabriel. He had to tell him what happened to Cas. It was his fault castiels parents did this to him, he needed to tell gabe.

"Dean?" Gabriel answered the phone.

"C-c-Cas. Hi-his d-da-d......" Dean broke down and started crying unable to continue talking. Sam took the phone from Dean and continued talking.

"Cas is in the hospital. His father hurt him really bad. I think Dean wants you down here." Said sam sadly. He was very upset too. He considered Cas a friend. And it made it worse that his brother was in so much pain.

Gabriel was speechless. It was his fault. He should've kept Cas there. He hung up and he packed a bag and got on a bus. A 14 hour bus ride home. 14 long horrible hours to Cas. He cried quietly most of the ride.

When Gabriel arrived at the hospital Cas was in a coma. His face was bruised along with his arms and neck. The cracks in his lips were still stained with blood. He looked he was barely holding on. There were bandages around his head, arms, and the top half of his body was  
all wrapped up. He was also hooked up to a ventilator because he was having trouble breathing on his own. He walked over to Castiel and sat down on the chair next to his bed.

"Little brother...." He croaked, "oh god. I am so sorry." He cried holding castiels hand. He knew his father didn't do this just to punish Cas, but also to punish himself. This is what Gabriel got. He wished Cas never came to visit. If it meant that Cas would be okay right now he wished he would have never been born. The doctors told him Cas was stable for now, but that didn't mean he would be later down the line. Police also asked him questions about his parents. He told them everything they ever did to them. He was scared before because if he thought he told they would hurt Cas. He wished he told sooner. The police thanked him for his cooperation and left the sad man alone to his tears.

"I'm-I'm so sorry." Dean said standing in the doorway to Cas's room. He couldn't look at gabe in the eye. He just looked down. Speaking to the floor.

"You didn't do this, lover boy." Gabriel didn't blame Dean. He knew nothing. Gabriel blamed himself. He knew what was going to happen, it was all his fault. Dean sat next to Gabriel silently. They just sat there and stared at Cas. Watching for any signs of life. Cas was perfectly still. The breathing machine rhythmic. It was so horribly perfect. He wanted to cry, but no tears came out.

"Dean?" Said Sam standing in Cas's room. Dean looked over at him and motioned for him to come closer. Sam walked over to Dean. Dean grabbed him and pulled him into his lap hugging him. Thankfully nothing was wrong with sam. Sam leaned back into Dean and stayed silent. He fell asleep soon after.

John came back and found his boys in Cas's room. he held up a bag off food he got when he was home. "Your friend can have some too." He said looking at Gabriel. He didn't respond. John frowned taking out three sandwiches. He laid them by Cas's feet and left the room. He could tell they needed to be alone for awhile.

Dean couldn't resist and picked up a sandwich and unraveled it. It didn't take him very long to finish. He picked up another one and tossed it to Gabriel.

"You need to eat, man. You being hungry ain't gonna help Cas." He finally broke the heavy silence. The silence was suffocating. Cas wouldn't get better if they stared at him and hoped he would just be better.

"I'll eat it if you admit you love Cas." He said not keeping his eyes off of Cas. It wouldn't help if they sat there in silence. Maybe it would help if they talked. Maybe Cas could hear them and he would wake up.

Dean closes his eyes, "I do love him, goddamnit I do." He said smiling softly at Cas. Never in his life had he loved someone like this. He wished he told him before it was too late. He wished he kissed him earlier. He wished Cas wasn't here, but at home with Dean watching stupid movies, making stupid jokes, saying stupid things, and maybe then after have a conversation about what they wanted to do with their life. They could go from joking around and serious and it wouldn't be weird. Nothing was weird with Cas. Dean felt like home when he was alone with him. He could be himself without feeling like we was being judged by a hundred eyes.

Gabriel nods and he ate his sandwich. He was tired, but he didn't want to sleep. Dean fell asleep not long after his sandwich was gone. A nurse came in and routinely check on Cas. He still couldn't breathe on his own. A doctor told Gabriel everything wrong with him,but he didn't listen. If it wasn't about Cas getting better than he didn't want to hear it.

"You need sleep." Said John appearing in the room. Gabriel shook his head. He wasn't going to sleep till he knew Cas was okay. "That wasn't a question. Get some sleep." John said sternly. This boy was exhausted. He needed to rest for his sake, but Gabriel didn't care about himself. That wasn't on his mind right now.

John sighed and pulled a chair up next to him. "You didn't know this was going to happen, kid. Sure you knew Cas might get the shit beat out of him, but you didn't know it would go this far. He won't get better if you don't stop blaming yourself." These boys needed to stop taking care of each other and start taking chair of themselves. Nothing would get better until they do.

Gabriel leaned his head on johns shoulder. It was uncomfortable leaning over the armrest of the chairs, but didn't mind. John wrapped his arm around him like he knew him since he was a child. He just saw that these boys needed to be taken care of for a change.

Over the next few days there were close calls with Castiel. He almost died a few times. Gabriel was pretty sure he did die, but the doctors just didn't tell him. There were signs he was getting better though. Swelling had decreased in his brain and well that's about it.

A week had passed and nothing happened with him. He didn't get worse, but he didn't get better. Gabriel hardly ever left his side. Dean was there too. They both shared their best stories with Cas. Dean still liked the one where he went over to Cas's house the first time and they both ended up slipping in the puddle of water. He never laughed that hard in his life. Gabriel's favorite story was when they went into a candy store and they would have to steal the candy. Whoever had the most at the end would win it all. Cas won of course and gabe told him he had to eat all the candy before they went home. Castiel complied and he started going crazy from all the sugar. He was running around screaming and hollering. He rolled down some hills laughing all the way down. He accidentally ran into a tree, but he kept laughing, running in another direction. It was the funniest thing he ever seen. They both were laughing at the end of that one. The first time time they laughed since Cas was put into this hospital.

The news came by and wanted to ask questions, but Dean told them that nobody cared about him before so they shouldn't now just because he was hurt. He proceded to threaten to break their cameras until they left. Once they left Dean sat back down next to Cas and gabe.

"My dad said that I have to sleep at home tonight." Dean said

"Okay" said Gabriel nodding.

"He also said that you had to come back to my house too." John did say that. It was his responsibility to take care of them now, no one else was going to do it. He shook his head. He couldn't leave Cas.

"He ain't even breathing on his own yet. He's not just gonna magically wake up." Dean said. He wished he was getting better, but he wasn't and trying to pretend like he was better wasn't going to help. Gabriel ran his hands over his face. Just one night then he would come back.

Once Dean came home sam wouldn't leave his side. He missed his brother and there was only so much time at the hospital he could take. Dean didn't mind. He watched tv with him along with Gabriel. They all fell asleep on the couch and didn't wake up till noon the next day. The three of them went back to the hospital. Still no change. Gabriel had to go talk to the doctors and sam made friends with one of the nurses. She offered to take him to the children's part of the hospital so he could hang out with the other children. Dean was left alone with Cas. He walked up to him and moved the hair out of his face.

"Cas I never told you this, but I love you. Not just in a friend Kind of way, but like you know like a boyfriend kind of way. And I'm really kicking myself for not telling you sooner, or kissed you sooner cause I-" he voice started to crack. He was trying really hard not to cry, "cause I don't know if I'll ever be able to do that now..." His voice was starting to break, he was doing his best to hold back the tears. "And-and I just wanted you to know that when I picture myself happy....it's with you ......" He pressed his lips against his forehead closing his eyes. Deans Tears rolled down Cas' face. He stayed there till he noticed Gabriel came back. He wiped his face with his shirt and sat back down.

Over the next few weeks flowers and cards were sent to Cas. Cas didn't even know most of these people existed. Dean just threw their gift out. Unless it was food. Then him and Gabriel would pig out. The only other person who came to visit was the Librarian, mrs. Howl. She came and she read books to Cas and the boys. Cas would appreciate her doing this. He really would. She never came to the hospital upset or sad. Always brought a different book and always brought snacks. She was a good presence. Sam even asked her to read to the children in the children ward. She did happily. She always brightened anyone's day.

Castiel started coughing one day, chocking on the tubes down his throat. He wasn't awake yet just breathing on his own. This was a big step for Cas. The doctors said he might wake up soon, but they had no way of telling.

"Cas is pretty lucky." Gabriel said out of the blue one day. "He has all these hot nurse giving him baths. I don't know I think I might have to check myself in here." Gabriel joked. That's how he was coping with this now. Cracking a joke whenever he had the opportunity. "Hey it's good for you too. At least it's not some hot guy nurse." Gabriel laughed. Dean rolled his eyes and playfully pushed him. "You should read those letters." Gabe said being serious this time. Dean forgot about them. He would have to run home and get them.

Dean did eventually get them. He read them while Gabriel was asleep. He couldn't stop smiling. Cas was a brilliant writer. Describing Dean to the very last detail. He even confessed that he was confused about the way he felt about Dean. He just didn't know he felt. Dean stayed up all night reading them. A smile never leaving his face. He decided once Cas got better he would ask him out. He wasn't going to be a coward this time. He just hoped he got a chance to ask.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Castiel started tapping his hand against the bed one morning.

"Cas!" Dean jumped when he saw his hand moving. He took his hand into his and squeezed. Cas did the best he could to squeeze back. He was weak. He felt weak. What happened?

"Come on little brother." Gabe said going on the other side of the bed. He put his hand on top of Cas's head. He just needed him to say something or open his eyes, anything really. Castiel opened his mouth slightly. Trying to form words, but his mouth was too dry. Gabriel became impatient and opened castiels eyes for him. The light hurt his eyes and he squeezed them shut.

"Cas, can you hear me?" Dean asked leaning closely to his ear. He moved his fingers in deans hands as a yes. Dean smiled widely. "You're going to be okay Cas, don't worry." Dean said kissing his hand.

Gabriel called the doctors into the room. They examined Cas. They said he would become more responsive in the coming days. He would have to work at gaining his strength back. Laying in a hospital bed for a month didn't really do wonders in the muscle department. The doctors said he could go home when he could walk.

In a week Castiel was talking and sitting up. Dean and gabe had to keep telling him not to pick at the stitches on the side of his head. The stitches came up from behind his ear to above his eyebrow. It was going to leave a pretty wicked scar in deans opinion. Although Cas was becoming more healthy he still had nightmares about his father  
attacking him. He remembered what happened to him that night. His parents were yelling at him for leaving without their permission, going to see Gabriel, and also causing a disturbance at the school. He was also yelling about how Gabriel did this to Cas and how Gabriel would finally learn his lesson. The his father picked up a bat and bashed Cas in the side of his head. It knocked Cas to the floor and his father dragged him to Gabriel's room. There he proceeded to hit Castiel with the bat, repeatedly. He hit his head on the corner of a wall which knocked him out. He remembered he father stuffing him in the closet throwing curses at him. He locked the door and turned out all the lights. His father knew he went too far, but Cas deserved It. He would probably be dead by mooring so there wasn't much for him to do now. 

The next thing Cas remembered was waking up in the hospital with Gabriel and Dean by his side. He was glad Gabriel was there. He had no idea that he been in a coma for a month in a half. He was scared and didn't know where he was half the time during the first week of his awaking. Dean and gabe never left his side. Castiel liked it most when mrs. Howl came into read to them. It was his favorite part. Dean would always get upset when people sent meaningless cards and flowers. He bet none of them even knew Castiel. Cas didn't mind them though. He thought that these people were kind to do go out of there way for a stranger. Dean didn't see it that way.

There was a week left of summer when the doctors said he could leave. Cas said goodbye to the nurses and the doctors and thanked them for helping him. He didn't know where he was going once they left the hospital. It's not like he had a home to go to anymore. Gabe told him not to worry about it that he would take care of it. He wasn't sure how the hospital bills would be payed either. Gabriel said they don't have to pay because they were minors. Gabriel turned 18 in a couple days and Cas was only 16. The state would have to pay he guessed. He didn't care as long as he didn't have to.

Dean drove them to his house. John agreed to let the Cas and Gabe stay with him as long as they got a job to help foot the bills. Taking care of four boys is expensive. They were barely getting by with just the three of them. He would need the extra help. Dean and Gabriel agreed to both find jobs. Dean and Gabriel wanted to do cyber school this year so he could stay home with Cas, John agreed. As long as they went to school John didn't really care.

When they got home from the hospital Gabriel helped Cas out of the car. Cas insisted he could do it alone, but Gabriel followed him closely. Castiels arm was still in a cast, with the signatures of Dean, gabe, sam, mrs.howl, and John on it. Cas insisted that John sing it. It was everyone that he cared about on his arm. He smiled every time he looked down on it. When Cas walked through the front door sam came running over to him hugging him. He was careful not to hurt him. Cas smiled hugging back with his one good arm. It was a miracle Cas recovered as much as he did. He almost died multiple occasions, the doctors were surprised he even pulled through the surgeries let alone woke up. Dean was just glad he would have a second chance to tell him how he felt. He wasn't going to waste it this time.

John and sam made a celebratory pie for when Cas came home. They all sat down and had pie for dinner.

"This is a lot better than the food at the hospital." Cas said eating his pie in small bites. He ate it slowly. He was tired. He was usually tired now. Everything has become harder and took more effort. Even simple things such as walking.

"Yeah that food tasted like shit." Dean said inhaling his pie. It was his favorite food. Cas smiled taking another bite.

"Where am I sleeping?" Cas asked looking tired.

"I'm fixing up our basement so we can have your own rooms." Said Dean his mouth filled with pie. "You can sleep in my room if you want and gabe can sleep in Sams for now." Castiel nods taking a sip of his water. "Oh wait you need your pills." Said Dean reaching into his bag handing the three pill bottles to Cas. Cas took them with a glass of  
water.

"I'm gonna go to bed now,." Cas standing up. They nodded and Castiel walked up to deans room. He laid down on his bed and buried himself into the covers. It smelled like Dean. He felt like this is where he belonged. He slept peacefully for the first time in weeks without a nightmare. When he woke up Dean was sleeping next to him his arm wrapped around him. Everything was okay again.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Dean and Gabriel cleaned up the basement the week before school started. They had everything cleared out and put away. They fixed up the bathroom down there so it was fully functional. The basement had two office spaces and a bathroom. Once they cleaned them out they went back over to Mr and Mrs. Novak's house to gather beds, clothes and other items. Once they went into the house they went to Cas's room first. They put most of the stuff in boxes and put them in the impala. The dismembered the desk, dresser, book shelf, and the bed frame. They were going to rebuild it back in the basement. Once they got Cas room packed away they started making trips to deans house. They weren't very far part, but it was hard to carry one box at a time over. The mattress however wouldn't fit in the car so they had to go through the street carrying a mattress. Quite a sight to see. Castiel was sitting outside in the grass laughing at them. Cas liked being outside and soaking up the sun. He couldn't do much else with his broken arm and weak state.

"Yeah bet it's nice watching your boyfriend running around." Gabriel smirked. Cas looked at him strangely not knowing what he meant. Dean kicked Gabriel in the ass resulting in him losing his balance and falling in a puddle on the side of the road. Castiel laughed trying to go over there to help dean, but it ended up as Cas rolling on the ground laughing. Dean groaned rolling out of the puddle.

"Serves you right, lover boy." Gabe laughed. Dean was soaking wet.

"You ain't going into the house like that." John said walking out of the house to his truck. He didn't say anything else just got in his truck and left. Dean sighed and took off his wet shirt and kicked off his shoes. He undid his belt and took off his jeans.

"Dean! You can't just take off your clothes!" Cas exclaimed, "especially in front of the neighbors!" Cas giggled.

"Oh please, they're welcome." Dean smiled throwing his wet clothes by Cas. Dean picked up his side of the mattress again and they shoved it  
in the door.

"Dare Ya to wear just your underwear for the rest of the day." Gabe grinned carrying the mattress to basement stairs.

"Why? You have a crush on my ass?" Dean joked as they pushed the mattress down the stairs.

"Wanna see if Cas does." Gabe said walking down the stairs after the mattress.

"No, I'm not doing it. He needs to focus on getting stronger." Dean walked down the stairs.

"Maybe he would get stronger if you just showed him your-" Dean slapped the back of Gabriel's head. Dean wasn't going to bother cas with his feelings until he was stronger. Until then he had time to plan out what he was going to do.

Gabe snickered carrying the mattress into Cas's room. They set it up against the wall next to the other boxes. The put the furniture back together first. Putting the mattress back on the bed and put the sheets on next. They tried to put everything back the way his room was before.

"Alright go get Cas and lets see how he likes it." Said Dean still in just his underwear.

"Aye aye captain." Said Gabriel slapping his ass before going to get Cas. Gabe found Cas asleep in the grass out front. He thought something happened to him so he raced over to him shaking him with tears in his eyes. Castiel opened his eyes yawning.

"I'm sorry, I was just tired." Castiel said sitting up.

"It's okay." Said gabe putting Cas over his shoulder. Castiel was lighter than he usually was. He needed to eat more. Cas is 16 years old and Gabriel has no problem picking him up. That scared him.

"Gabe....what are you doing?" Cas asked smiling

"Got your room all set up." Said gabe carrying him down to his room Gabe laid Cas down on his bed. "Whatcha think?" He said

"I like it a lot. Thank you." Said Cas looking around his room. Cas stretched out and looked over at Dean. Cas smiled before looking down. He shouldn't stare at someone. Why was he even staring at Dean? He shouldn't want to look at someone down there, right? He just closed his eyes and pulled the covers over him.

"You good Cas?" Dean asked

"I'm just tired." Said Cas

"Alright well get some rest, I'll wake you up for dinner. You have physical therapy after." Castiel nodded and Dean went back upstairs to put some pants on. He couldn't believe he did that to Cas. Cas was obviously checking him out before he pulled the covers on top of  
himself.

"You need to eat more." Said Gabriel sitting down next to Cas.

"I'm gaining weight. The doctor said I was doing good." He said yawning, "I won't be so tired in a week or two and then I can start doing schoolwork and get my Cast off soon."

"Okay....you know I just I worry about my little brother." He half smiled messing up Cas's hair. Castiel nods.

"Also I wanted to ask you about something..." Said Gabriel. Castiel looks over at Gabriel. "You know it's okay to feel attracted to someone. Girl...or boy it doesn't matter." He said

"What do you mean?" He asked not fully understanding what he was saying.

"Sexual attraction, Cas! You know what sex is right?" Gabriel was seriously doubting he knew what that was.

"Y-yes. I know what it is." Said Cas sitting up crossing his arms over his chest.

"I saw Ya checking out Dean and you need to know there ain't nothing wrong with wanting him panting and moaning underneath, or on top, of you." Gabriel said with a straight face.

Castiels eyes went wide and his mouth hung open. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. It was very inappropriate. Cas remembered his parents telling him that it wasn't okay to want that, or something like that. Maybe his parents lied to him. Considering the type of people they were it would make sense if they had lied to him. "Bu-but mom and dad said that people didn't like to do that....that it was bad if you wanted to do that...." Cas said brining his knees to his chest.

"That's not true. It's perfectly fine to feel that way. You shouldn't be ashamed by how you feel. Got it?" Gabe said lifting Cas chin up and smiling. Castiel nods. He still wasn't sure what he really felt or wanted to do. Gabriel helped, but he needed more guidance. Or  
maybe he just needed Dean to make the first move.

The next day they went to get Gabriel's things. It was hard to be in the room where Dean found Cas. The blood was cleaned up, but there was a bad feeling in his stomach. They took everything in Gabriel's room expect for his pants. They didn't fit him anymore.

"We should sell all of my parents shit. We would make a killing." Said Gabriel carrying his mattress down the stairs with Dean. "And we wouldn't have to get jobs then."

"Yeah we can take whatever we need and sell the rest." Dean said heading out the door.

The novaks had a lot of money. Expensive Jewelry, furniture, paintings, wine, and pretty much anything they could get out of the house, they sold. The house went to Gabriel when he turned 18. The mortgage was already payed off so it was his. His parents account were frozen at the moment because they were still at large. Once they were apprehended the money would go to Gabriel. He was always looking over his shoulder to make sure his parents weren't there. They could come back and hurt them at any time. He wished they would be found washed up on the beach dead. He hated them with every fiber of his body. Dean felt the same way and Cas just didn't think about them. He hated them, but he didn't dwell on them anymore.

When Dean was in the Novak's walk-in-closet he noticed the floor didn't sound the same everywhere. He ripped up the carpet and found a floor safe. "Hey gabe!!" Dean hollered. Gabriel came into the closet and crouched next to Dean.

"People only keep valuable things in safes." Dean said trying to open it. They tried to guess the combination, but with no luck.

"We can cut it out of the floor and throw it off the roof." Gabe said

"Alright." Said Dean going into the garage grabbing a sledge hammer. They broke up the floor around it and lifted the safe up. It was extremely heavy. "Jesus shit what the hell is in here?" Said Dean as they very slowly carried it up the stairs.

"Beats me." They get it to Gabriel's room and opened his windows. "Dean go down there and I'll drop it." He said

Dean ran outside to where the concert slab was under his window. Probably had a shed there at one point, but now it was the perfect landing zone. Gabriel pushed it out the window and it landed with a giant crack. Dean went over to the safe with the door on it hanging loosely. He pried it open and stacks of 100 dollar bills tumbled out along with a couple of fake passports, birth certificate, IDs, anything you would need to start another life.

Gabriel came outside and looked down at the safe, "holy shit." He said bending down next to Dean. "Guess the forgot to raid their safe before ditching." He said picking up the money.

"My guess is that they already had what they needed was somewhere else. Probably just waiting to see if Cas was gonna croak before they decided if they needed to leave town." Said Dean flipping through the passports.

"Probably." Said Gabriel looking down. He hoped their parents showed up dead soon.

"What the hell did your parents do for a living anyways?" Dean asked turning towards gabe.

"I don't know. I asked them and my dad got out his belt.....well let's just say I couldn't sit down for a week. Kinda got in my head that I wasn't supposed to ask." Gabe said looking to see if there was anything else in the safe.

"Oh.....well uh maybe these will help the police." He said lifting up the passports.

"We are keeping the money though." Gabe said

"No shit we are." Dean said.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Once they sold everything the could out of the house they made a lot of money, almost $300,000. John took the money and put it into bank accounts for Gabriel and Cas. He said they would be too irresponsible with the money so he turned it into their college funds. John took $50,000 and put it away for food, clothes, and other necessities for Cas and Gabriel. He was proud of the boys for doing this on their own and being responsible and not blowing the money on beer and girls.

Most of the stuff sold for even more than it should have when people knew that belonged to wanted criminals. The police had figured that chuck and Anns had a double life. Wanted for murder in three separate states, there were probably more, but those were just the ones found on the fake IDs. The police put together that they were business people. They would sell illegal items on the black market. They could even smuggle in items from other continents. Once this hit the news Gabriel and Cas were practical famous in the medias eyes. They asked for interviews, but they turned most of them down. It would be too traumatizing for Cas. He still had nightmares and the subject about his parents made him uncomfortable and anxious.

Although Cas did want to do one. It was for an organization that helped people get out of situations with an abusive partner or parent. Before they could ask any questions to Cas they would have to run them through Gabriel. Cas thought that was unnecessary, but Gabriel insisted. They didn't ask a lot of questions about what happened, but more what what is he going to do. When they asked him what he wanted to do with his life now and he had to think awhile. He never thought about what he was going to do when he got out of high school.

"I-I like to write. Maybe I-I'll be a writer." Cas said after he thought for a long time. He often wrote of what happened in his life. He kept a journal when he was younger, when Gabriel left he wrote the letters, and after he returned he wrote back in his journal. Once the interview was over they thanked Cas for allowing them to have this opportunity. Castiel thought that interview went well and was excited for the article. Hopefully he could help someone.

It was half way through the school year when Castiel was finally cleared from physical therapy. He gained most of his original weight back and he was no longer was tired from doing simple activities. Castiel started to take karate classes again. The doctors said it would be good for him to have regular exercise in his routine.

His 17th birthday was coming up and Dean decided he was going to take him to a place where it would just be the two of them and he would tell him how he felt. He was a nervous wreck when it came time for Cas's birthday. Dean woke Cas up very early in the morning, it was very unlike Dean to get up before noon, but Castiel crawled out of bed  
and got dressed. Dean had his shirt tucked into his pants with a tie on. He never dressed like this, Castiel was wondering what was going on. Dean led him out to the impala. It was very dark outside, the moon was still in the sky. Castiel asked Dean where they were going, but it was a surprise. Dean turned on his favorite music and started to drive. They drove a long time and Castiel fell asleep. Dean drove them out to the swing they found when they went to go meet Gabriel. The sun was just about to come up when Dean parked on the side of the road. He went to the trunk and got out a basket. He woke up Cas and his eyes lit up when he saw where they were. He jumped out of the car and grabbed deans hand. They walked to the tree swinging their arms like they did the first time. When they found the tree again Castiel ran to the swing. The sun was just beginning to rise, it was going to be perfect. Dean took a blanket out of the basket and laid it down by the tree. Castiel was happily swinging and not pay any attention to Dean. When he looked up he saw Dean sitting on the blanket leaning up against the tree. He was smiling at Cas. Castiel got off of the swing and sat next to Dean. Dean wrapped his arm around Cas as the sun was rising.

"Dean it's so beautiful here." Cas smiled looking up at Dean.

"I know it is. That's why I brought you here." He said pulling Cas closer to him, "I brought some breakfast if you want some." Said Dean. He brought castiels favorite, waffles with whip cream. To Cas nothing could ever live up to it. When Dean gave it to him he finished it off in under three minutes. His face was covered with whip cream when he was done. Dean laughed and wiped his face with a napkin, he knew things would get messy. Once they finished eating they resumed watching the sun rise. Dean thought Cas looked perfect with his messed up hair and wearing deans oversized sweatshirt because it was getting cold. Dean moved his hand from his shoulder to his waist. He wanted Castiel, badly.

"Cas." Dean said quietly. Castiel looked over at him. He still had some whip cream on his nose, "I love you." He said into his ear, moving his lips dangerously close to Cas. He pressed their foreheads together gently, "May I?" Dean whispered looking Cas in the eyes. Castiel didn't know what to do. He didnt want to move, but he was  
scared. He wasn't sure what dean was going to do. He started playing with deans tie. He did like the blue tie, It was calming, comforting. Castiel closed his eyes, he wanted this. Whatever dean was going to do, he wanted. It was a new feeling and he liked it. He nodded giving Dean permission. Dean moved his hand to the back of castiels tangled hair. He could feel the scar behind his ear. Dean pressed his lips gently against Cas's. Cas had no idea how to kiss someone, dean could tell. Dean started out slow until Castiel got the hang of it. Cas never felt this way before. There were butterflies in his stomach. He held on to deans tie with one hand and his other arm went around the back of deans neck. Dean pushed Cas on his back gently and laid on top of him.

"All you have to do is to say stop when you want to stop, okay?" Dean said tracing castiels scar along his head. Castiel nodded. He didn't want Dean to stop. He loved the taste of him, how warm he was, how gentle he was. He didn't just love Dean winchester, he was in love with him. Dean smiled and lean down to kiss Cas again. He went slow.mHe never wanted this to end. He slid his hand up Cas's shirt. He moved his warm hand along the cold body beneath him. Castiel gasped at deans touch. No one ever touched him there. Dean started to suck along Cas's neck.

"Dean...." Said Cas closing his eyes still holding onto the tie. Dean left castiels neck leaving soon to be bruises and kissed castiels jaw. Dean pulled away from Castiel for a minute. He took off his buttoned down shirt and untucked his T-shirt. He didn't want to take the tie off considering Castiel was still holding on to it.

Dean laid back on Cas kissing him again. He slid his hand up castiels shirt again. Cas decided to do the same with dean. One hand held onto the tie and the other went up deans shirt. He ran his fingers along deans side. He wasn't sure if he was doing anything right, but Deanvwas only smiling so he couldn't be that bad. Cas saw people doing this in the movies he watched with dean, but he never thought he would be doing it himself. He felt incredible.

Despite the chilly weather Dean took off his t-shirt. It was in the way. Dean started to press his hips on Cas. He let out small noises of pleasure when Dean did this. He wasnt sure why he was feeling what he was feeling, but he trusted Dean. "You good Cas?" Dean whispered in castiels ear. Cas nodded smiling. He was nothing but good. "Let me know when it's too much." Dean said undoing his own belt buckle. He ran his hand over Cas pants undoing the buttons. "Is it okay if I-" Dean said moving his hand inside Cas pants. Cas moaned and moved his hips up. Dean took that as yes. He started massaging Cas. Cas never felt like this before. It felt wonderful. He wanted more. He never felt this kind of longing before. It felt so good being so close to Dean. He forgot about the cold and took off his shirt. He didn't just want Dean, he needed him. Dean put his hand under Cas's boxers. He closed his eyes and rested his head on Cas.

Cas arched his back, simple sounds of pleasure rolled off his tongue. Dean moved his hand faster inside of Cas's clothing. Cas became louder and Dean became harder. Dean shook castiels bottoms to his knees and he placed his mouth on Cas. It didn't take long for Cas to release inside of Dean. Dean pulls up castiels pants and lays on top of the heavy breathing Cas. 

"De-Dean..." Cas said kissing Dean sloppily. Never had he experienced that much pleasure, he didn't think it was possible. "I-I love you." He said. Dean smiled rolling on his side pulling Cas closer to him.

"I love you so much." Dean said into Cas's hair. Never had he felt so happy before. "Happy birthday." Dean mumbled into his ear. Cas forgot it was his birthday. He forgot the whole world in fact. It was just him and Dean. No one else existed. Just them.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

"Damnit Cas you're freezing." Said Dean after laying with each other awhile. He reached over and grabbed Cas shirt and his sweatshirt. Dean pulled them over castiels head and arms. Castiel found himself holding onto the tie again. He loves this tie and he didn't know why. Dean took the tie off his neck and slipped it around Cas's head. "It matches your eyes." Dean smiled tightening the tie around his neck. "And it looks a lot better on you." Dean kissed Cas softly. Kissing cas would never get old.

Cas reached over and grabbed deans shirts, helping him put them on. "Thank you Dean." he smiled sitting up. Dean sat against the tree again and pulled Cas into his lap. They could hear running amongst the corn stalks beside them.

"Oh shit." Dean said buttoning his pants up again. A little boy appeared out from the cornstalks. He was wearing sneakers, blue overalls and a long sleeve shirt.

"Who is youins doing outta here?" He said crossing his arms over his chest. He had brown curls hanging on the top of his head.

"Uh I'm dean and this is Cas." Said Dean sitting up straight pulling Cas off his lap.

"Why Yous a here?" He asked climbing on the swing.

"We wanted to watch the sun come up." Said Cas smiling.

"Look we were just going....." Said Dean standing up.

"No! I will tell ma and pa if you leaves." He said trying to push himself on the swing. Dean groaned sitting back down on the blanket. He didn't need to deal with some snot nose screaming kid today. Castiel got up and went behind the boy pushing him gently. The boy laughed kicking his feet back and forth.

After 15 minutes the boy's mother was calling him inside.

"Cutis! Get yo self inside!" She called out over the corn field. She knew he was out on the swing playing. The boy groaned jumping off the swing and disappearing though the corn. He left without a goodbye.

"Ready to go back and celebrate your birthday with everyone else?" Dean asked smiling up at Cas. Castiel smiled back going over to Dean. Dean packs everything back up except for the blanket. He put that around Cas shoulders and grabbed his hand. While they walk back to the car Castiel rested his head on deans shoulder. They walked back without saying a word. Just swinging their arms a little too fast to be normal.

Once they got back to the car Dean put the basket in the trunk. Castiel laid down in the seat laying his head on deans lap. Dean smiled and placed his hand in castiels hair. He turned on the car and started to drive back home.

"Are you my Boyfriend now?" Cas asked breaking the silence.

"Hell yeah I am. I don't blow just any guy." Dean smirked

"Do I have to 'blow' you so I can be your boyfriend?" Castiel asked looking up at Dean.

"No Cas." Dean laughed, "you're my already my boyfriend." Dean smiled. He loved Cas. Always making him smile when he doesn't understand. He never wanted Cas to change.

"And cas, the things we did back there that's just between you and me. Don't go blabbing about the things we did. We only talk and do those things when we are alone. Understand me?" Dean asked Cas. Castiel understood. It was something only they did and he understood why Dean wanted It to be just between them.

"Can I tell Gabriel you're my boyfriend?" He asked

"Yeah we can tell him." Dean smiled turning on his music.

They returned home around one o'clock in the afternoon. It was only sam and Gabriel home. Gabriel liked to play pranks on Sam It was funny to see him get all frustrated. Dean and Cas came home holding hands. They walked into a mess of a kitchen. There was flour everywhere. And there were two boys covered in it too.

"H-hi Dean." Sam smiled sheepishly

"you two. outside. Now." Dean said walking back out the front door Castiel trailing behind him smiling.

"I hate you." Sam whispered to Gabriel following Dean and Cas.

"Haha I bet you do." Gabe smirked walking outside.

Dean is crouched on the ground turning on the hose. "Dean why can't I just shower?" Sam whined.

"1, this will be a hell of a lot more fun for me. And 2, I don't need you clogging the drain with all the flour." Dean stood up smiling.

Gabriel took off his shoes and shirt. There was flour all down his stomach. Dean chuckled spraying Gabriel. "That's cold you know!" Gabriel yelled. He was dancing around the front yard, but Dean only laughed spraying him more. Sam was laughing too until Dean sprayed  
him.

"Hey!" He said jumping at the cold water hitting his skin.

"You brought this on yourself kiddo." Dean smiled spraying him more. "Alright let me get the backside of you." Dean said. Sam groaned turning around. Dean washed the rest of the flour off the two of them. They both were soaking with water from head to toe. Gabriel looked at. sam and then looked at the hose. Sam smirked and nodded. They rushed Dean taking to hose from him and spraying Dean.

Castiel runs away before they could spray him. Sam was rolling on the ground laughing as gabe was spraying Dean. Castiel ran into the house grabbing a water gun from the closet. He ran downstairs changing into a swimsuit and fill the gun up in the bathroom. Once he was all set he ran back outside spraying both sam and Gabriel.

Gabriel turned around and started spraying Cas. Castiel laughed trying to run to some place he could hide. Dean grabbed the hose from Gabriel and shoved it down his pants.

"Woa-ho! Easy tiger!" Gabriel said jumping at the icy water. Dean laughed and took the hose running after sam. Dean caught up with him and wrapped his arm around his waist. Sam tried to escape, but Dean shoved the hose down his pants and tickled him. Sam couldn't stop laughing And squealing.

"Say I'm prettier than you." Said Dean tightening his grip on sam so he couldn't slip away. Sam shook his head squirming around. Dean tickled him more.

"You're-you're prettier than me!" Sam shouted in between laughs.

"You're going to stop spraying me?" Dean asked loosening up.

"Y-yes!" He said barely being able to breathe from laughing. Dean smiled letting go of sam and taking the hose out of his pants. He fell to the ground still laughing. Dean walked over to Gabriel and sprayed him again before turning off the water. Dean laid back on the grass tried from running around. Castiel laid next to Dean out of breath from laughing.

"I hate every single one of you." Said Gabriel from the ground.

Dean laughed wrapping his arm around Cas. "You guys brought it on yourself." He said.

"I thought it was fun." Castiel smiled

"I bet you did." Said Dean kissing Cas.

"You kissed!" Sam said jumping up running over to them.

Dean smiled, "yeah that's what you do to your boyfriend." Dean said looking at Cas. Castiel blushed looking over at Gabriel.

"Knew you had it in Ya, lover boy." Gabe said give him a thumbs up. "Just put a sock on the door when you're doing it." Gabe said smirking.

Dean rolled his eyes standing up picking Cas up with him. "Cas you're the least wet, go get the towels." Said Dean.

"Okay." Said Cas going inside grabbing the towels. They dry themselves off the best they can before going back inside and changing. Gabriel and sam cleaned up the kitchen and finished the cake they were working on. They sat down and sang happy birthday to Cas before eating it. They didn't bother to cut it up. They just used their forks and dove in.

"I think I ate too much...." Said Cas leaning back in his chair rubbing his belly.

"Holy shit." Said Dean laying on the floor. The four boys all had stomach pains.

"I think I'm gonna die." Gabriel groaned laying on top the counter.

After twenty minutes the boys felt better again and they decided to watch some movies. They all squished together on one couch and turned on the tv.

"Oh wait I have something for Cas." Said Gabriel getting up after a couple episodes of Ghost Facers. He runs down to his room and grabs a giant bag of assorted candy. He comes back up and tosses it on Cas's lap. "You're gonna have to eat all of that before John gets home." Gabriel smirked.

"Why?" Cas asked digging through the bag.

"You think he's gonna be happy if he finds out you have all that candy?" Gabriel asked leaning back into the chair.

Cas sighed and started unwrapping the candy. He ate half of the bag and he started getting jittery. Tapping his foot moving around in his seat, Dean had to keep telling him to knock it off. Once Cas finished the whole bag he started to bounce off the walls.

"I wanna run. Let's go run. Come sam you like to run, let's go." Cas said talking a mile a minute he ran over to the door. His hand was shaking and his veins were full of sugar.

"Alright fine. You can go run around." Said Dean getting up going after the bolting Cas. They all go outside and Cas is running up and down their yard.

"Dean! Dean! Dean! Dean! Let's go to the park! Come on! Let's go to the park!" Said Cas starting to run to the park.

"Fuck this shit." Dean said before getting in the impala. He was in no shape to run after Cas. Sam and Gabriel got in the car too and Dean drove after Cas. He was running along side of the car before they reached park.

It took Cas five minutes to get to the park. He still wasn't remotely tired. "I want to catch a squirrel! Gabe! Gabe! Let's catch a squirrel!" Cas yelled out running after a squirrel. Cas chased it all throughout the park. He wasn't looking where he was going and fell right into the pond. Castiel started laughing uncontrollably unable to get out from laughing too hard. He was almost out until he fell back in.

"Damnit Cas." Said Dean running over to the pond pulling him out. Castiel was choking on his own laughter at deans feet. Gabriel was momentarily incapacitated by his laughter. "Come on time to get you home." Dean said lifting him to his feet.

"No Dean! It's my birthday! I wanna-I wanna.....Go sleding!!" He said running off to the abandoned sled he saw out of the corner of his eye.

"Cas! Get back here now!" Dean said running after Cas. "Don't Fucking do-" Castiel picked up the sled and took a running start down the hill. The sled didn't move on the grassy ground, but Cas did. He slid on his stomach to the bottom. Dean was scared shitless that he was hurt. He never ran faster than that moment, especially since he didn't hear Cas. He jumped down,the hill and found Cas crouched over on the ground.

"Cas!!" Dean slid over on his knees to him.

"Look Dean....its a bunny." Said Castiel smiling holding a baby bunny in his hand. Grass stains on his jacket

"It probably has fucking rabies. put it down." Dean said not amused anymore. He thought Cas was seriously hurt. It was not funny to him anymore. He told him to stop and he didn't listen, he was angry.

"But Dean I want to keep it." He said holding it close to him.

"I'm sure his parents want to keep it too." Dean said standing up grabbing Cas's hand yanking him up. "Say goodbye." Dean said. Castiel frowns like a child and puts it down.

"Bye destiel." He said sadly. Destiel? What the hell? Dean thought. Dean realized about half way up the hill that it was their names put together. Dean thought It was kind of cute.

"Am I in trouble?" Cas asked looking down. He still looked like a child doing his puppy dog eyes.

"I told you to fucking stop" Dean said pulling him to the car.

"I wanted to sled......" Cas said quietly.

"You should've stopped first. I don't care that it's your birthday. If I tell you to stop. You stop." Dean said squeezing his hand harder once he felt him trying to wriggle out of his grip. Castiel pouted. "Stop being a baby and get in the car." Dean was fed up with this  
child act. He hoped it was just part of this stupid sugar high Gabriel decided to give him.

Cas pulled his hand away from deans and stomped into the backseat. He crossed his arms over his chest and ignored Dean and everyone else on the ride home. When he got home he marched to his room and slammed the door. Cas didn't care that he smelled like duck ass from the pond, he just sat in his room and pouted like a three year old.

"Happy fucking birthday to you Cas." Dean said going to his room and,locking the door. He felt like crying and he didn't know why. He put in his headphones, blasting his music. He stared at the ceiling before he heard knocking at his door. Dean pulled out his headphones and went to the door. Cas was there with tears in his eyes.

"Please forgive me Dean. I'm sorry." Cas said with a tear escaping from his eyes. Cas didn't think he ever made Dean angry before. He was afraid that he would want to leave him. He needed to make Dean not mad at him.

"hey don't cry." Dean said wiping his his face with his thumb. "It's fine." Dean said.

"I should have stopped. I just really wanted to sled. I'll stop next time. Please don't leave me." He said shaking on a verge of a breakdown.

"Hey hey hey. I'm not gonna leave you. I was just scared that you got hurt. It's okay, man." Said Dean pulling him into a hug. he smelled pretty terrible, but that wasn't the most important thing right now. Dean calmed down Cas and kissed the top of his head. He tasted like toxic waste that had rotted. "Cas you need a bath dear god." Dean said pulling away from. Castiel laughed a little and nodded. Dean led him down the hall to the bathroom. He closed the door behind them and turned on the water. Castiel sat on the toilet and waited for the water to fill up.

"Alright Cas I'll be in my room if you need me." Dean said standing up. Castiel grabbed his wrist and shook his head.

"You can stay in here." He said looking up at Dean. Dean smirked and sat back down.

Castiel shed his dirty pants and shirt and folded them and put them on the sink. He took took off his underwear and got I tot he bathtub. Dean bit his lip as he watched Castiel slip into the tub. Cas turned off the water and smiled up at Dean. He felt comfortable with Dean in here.

"Want me to join ya?" Dean asked looking up and down at Cas.

Cas didn't really want that. He wasn't sure if was ready. Of course Dean did touch him down there, but that was different. He also didn't want to let Dean down. Castiel brought his knees to his chest and hugged them. He didn't say anything just stared blankly in front of him.

"Hey hey hey Cas it's okay. I didn't mean to make you upset." Dean said moving over to him. Of course Dean had to mess this up. Making Cas feel uncomfortable. He shouldn't have put him into that situation. He was going to fast for him. Castiel didn't know what to say to him, or what to do so he just sat there. "Hey-o we have some bubbles for you." Dean said trying to change the topic. He dumbed some of the bubble liquid into it and and swirled it around with his hand, careful not to touch Cas.

Castiel relaxed laying in the tub so only his head was above the water. He never had bubbles in his bath before. He took a handful of bubbles and put it on deans face. He laughed at the face Dean made. "Thank you Castiel, I think the beard suits me." Dean said in a funny accent. Cas put the bubbles on his face creating his own beard. Dean smiled putting bubbles on top of Cas's head.

They played with the bubbles for awhile until they got bored. Dean went down to Cas's Room and got him his pajamas that matched his. He came back up and handed them to Cas. Castiel smiled and slipped them on. He picked up his dirty clothes and followed Dean to his room.

"Cas we might have to burn these clothes." Dean said putting his hand on his shoulder. They smelled horrible. Castiel yawned and went down stairs putting them in a trash bag. He threw the bag down the stairs to his too. He was to tired to put them in his room. Realizing it now he probably should have put them in the washing machine. He was extremely tired or some reason and he went back upstairs to deans room. Dean was already in his matching sleepwear and laying down on the bed. Castiel climbed into bed with Dean almost falling asleep as soon as he hit the mattress. "Happy birthday Cas." Dean said kissing his forehead wrapping his arms around him. Castiel fell asleep almost instantly after that. This is what John called the sugar coma. It's when after you come down from the sugar High and all the sudden fall asleep. John had a lot of experience with this with Dean when he was younger, he was an expert on sugar high and lows if there ever was one.


	18. Chapter Eighteen

It's a month before school ended when Castiel was called to the stand for his mothers trial. He didn't want to do this, but they said if he didn't then the defense would just subpoena him. Gabriel said it would be okay because they would be right there with him supporting him. Castiel was extremely nervous when he got on the stand. He was shaking and his heart was beating very fast and loud. He looked at Dean to be calmed down. It worked. Castiel still had a bad feeling about this.

Castiel tried not to look at his mother. She had a way of manipulating people. She could get under your skin just by looking at you. Castiel did his best to keep his eyes off of her. Once the attorney from the prosecution side started asking him questions he had s panic attack. He could hardly breathe. Dean had to come up and calm him down. Telling him it would be okay. Once Castiel could breathe again Dean started to walk backwards never taking eyes off of Cas. Castiel smiled at him.

All of the sudden Cas heard a gunshot. He looked at Dean and he was standing still. He looked down at his chest and touched the bloody wound. He couldn't feel it, but he could see it. He looked up at Cas and tried to say I love you, but blood filled his mouth. Another shot went off and Dean fell to the ground. This time there was a gaping hole in the back of his head. He was dead. Castiel couldn't move, he couldn't Scream, he couldn't cry, he could only feel the tremendous break in his heart. His own mother shot down the only man he ever loved. He was gone and he could never tell him the the loved him again.

Another shot went off. He could hear the screams as it ripped through Gabriel's body. He was trying to protect sam from the bullet. He took it to the heart and fell on top of sam. Gabriel took a special liking to sam. He was like another little brother to him. Castiel tried to scream, but still nothing came out. Ann was soon shot by an officer behind her. If only the officer shot her thirty seconds before. Dean would still be alive. He would have take Castiel in his arms and tell him it would be okay even though he had no idea if it would be. He would make Castiel smile and feel special. He would take him home and kiss him until he was too tired to move. Dean would love him more than he ever loved himself, but that dream was gone. Torn away by two bullets and one wicked mother.

His brother Gabriel would never make another stupid joke, no matter how terrible or if he didn't understand it, another one would never be spoken on this earth. He would never have to deal with his overprotective brother always breathing over him again. He would never be hugged by him, he would never hear his laugh again. He heard John crying. He never heard that man cry before in his life. He didn't think he could cry, oh but how wrong he was. The sobs rang in his ear as he discovered his boy lying face down on the ground in a puddle of his own blood. First his wife and now this. How would he ever recover?

Castiel turned to the microphone on the stand. "My name is Castiel Novak. My parents were abusive towards me and my brother our whole life. My father almost killed me beating me with a baseball bat. My mother just killed the man I love and my only brother, here today." Castiel stood up and walked towards Dean. He laid down next to him and wrapped his arm around him. It was his turn to take care of him. It was his turn to be strong for them. "It's gonna okay." Cas whispered. Nothing was ever going to be okay again.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

Castiel woke up screaming drenched in sweat and tears. "Dean!!!!!" He screamed. He didn't hear Dean. "Dean!!!!!!!" He screamed again even louder. He soon heard footsteps running down the stairs to his room.

"Cas! Wants wrong?!" Dean said running over to him in his underwear and T-shirt. Castiel started to sob into deans shoulder. Another dream about the upcoming trial. They were getting more vivid each time. It always ended with Dean dead. Castiel couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't control his cries. Dean laid down pulling him on top of himself covering them with a blanket. Castiel cried for the whole night. The trial was the next day and there was no way he or anyone of the people he loved going to that trial. He would nail the doors shut if he had to. Dean said he would talk to the attorney and see if there was a way out of it.

Cas would have to go to the courthouse, but he could sit in a room and they would video tape him. Cas felt better about that option. Dean promised to be there every step of the way. Side by side.

Cas just wanted Dean to come. He didn't want sam, Gabriel, or John to be put in possible harms way. He didn't really want Dean to come either, but he insisted. It felt good not be alone at the courthouse. He didn't think he could be there without Dean. Dean walked him to the special room and they sat down. Dean held Cas's hand under the table. Whenever Cas would get a question made him nervous or it was a hard question for Cas Dean would reassuringly squeeze castiels hands from under the table. He had to take a couple of breaks before he finished with the first round of questions. The questions from the defense were harsh and up to front. He had a hard time thinking clearly while he was being practically yelled out. He was trying to make it look like Cas attacked them leaving them no other choice to defend themselves. Castiel was very angry that someone had the nerve to tell him that this was his fault. Castiel snapped.

"I didn't attack them when they made me walk barefoot through the forest because I forgot to take my shoes off inside!! I didn't attack them when they locked me in a closet for two days because I was home a couple minutes late!!! I didn't attack them when my mother bought me a knife and told me to cut myself!!!!!!! And I certainly didn't attack them when my father beat me with a baseball bat for going to see my brother I hadn't seen in two years!!!!!!! Tell me this was my fault one more time!!!!!!!!" Castiel practically screamed at the camera. He didn't think at all, he just snapped and spoke whatever was in his mind. The other side was quiet for quite sometime.

"The defense has no further questions." Said the defense sitting back down at his table. The room whole room was silent and all staring at Ann Novak. The camera went black. Castiel was wearing his blue tie. Dean gave him for his birthday, he was playing with it. Dean was rubbing Cas's back without saying a word, there wasn't much to say.

When Dean and Cas were walking out of the courthouse a man behind them called deans name. Dean turned around, he didn't recognize the man who did call his name. Before he knew it the man had a gun and fired twice at Dean, the bullets hit him twice in the chest Castiel became a frozen statue watching his Dean fall. His knees were shaking and his stomach was sick. This couldn't be happening. He wanted to wake from the dream, but nothing happened. Castiel sunk to his Dean moving the hair out of deans face.

Deans eyes shot open and started to breathe heavily. He reached over his chest and sighed of relief. Castiel didn't understand what was happening with Dean, Dean ripped his shirt open to reveal a bulletproof vest. The two golden bullets were wedged in the blue fabric. Castiel cried in relief putting his hands on his face. "D-don't worry Cas. I-I-I'm bat man." Dean laughed painfully. It hurt being shot, but not as much as it hurt to see the look on Cas face when he heard the shots. Castiel leaned his head against deans. He just held him until they made him get off the floor with Dean.

The dreams scared Dean too. He didn't want to to be killed in the courthouse. He bought the vest and was going to show Cas he had it on after they got into the car. Once they got home Castiel went to bed with Dean. He held him in arms close to him. He didn't speak much that night except for "I love you" and "I'm sorry". Castiel didn't speak much over the next week. He went to a therapist, which he probably should have gone to one a long time ago, she prescribed Cas with anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills. He got better after awhile. He started laughing with Dean and Gabriel again. He was feeling better.


	20. Chapter Twenty

When Castiel went to college he and Dean drifted apart. They were still friends, just not the way they were. They never officially 'broke up', but they didn't really consider themselves together in that way anymore. Castiel spent most of his time studying at college while Dean decided to work at an auto repair shop. College wasn't his cup of tea. It wasn't till after Castiels book was publish and became a number one best seller did they start reconnecting again. Dean wasn't much of a reader, but he read that book inside and out. It was about castiels life and a big part of that book was about him and Dean. It talked about their friendship and their relationship. Cas even wrote about how they weren't together anymore and that was the biggest regret of his life. Dean started receiving emails and letters from the fans of the book saying how he and Cas should get back together. There was a lot of talk about wanting "Destiel to become canon" again. Whatever the hell that meant.

Dean was twenty six years old when he called Cas and asked him if he wanted to get something to eat. It was the first time in four years Castiel genuinely smiled. They were never sure how they drifted apart, maybe it was not being together constantly or maybe they just needed some space for awhile. Neither of them saw anyone else. It never felt right when they were with someone else.

Dean wasn't the same without Castiel. He started to drink like his father did. He was turning into his father. A lone and a drunk. Sam was In Stanford with his girlfriend, Jessica. Gabriel decided not to go to college, but instead used his money to open up his own candy store. John said that was foolish, but Gabriel disagreed. Everyone likes candy and he was right. Gabriel was pretty successful. He didn't have a girlfriend, but more of a friend with benefits. Gabriel wasn't interested in a serious relationship and neither was she. They worked well together.

Castiel was no longer a clueless teenager. He was a responsible adult who took things too literal sometimes. He still wore the blue tie Dean gave him every chance he got. It reminded him of when they were happy together.

Dean picked Castiel up from his apartment and took him to a coffee shop. They got their drinks and sat down. They weren't really sure what to say to each other. It's been a long time since they did this. "Congrats on your book, man. It was really good." Dean said looking up at Cas. He missed his blue eyes.

"Thank you, Dean. I'm glad you enjoyed it." He smiled up at Him. They stayed in silence awhile before anyone spoke again.

"Damnit Cas what happened to us?" Dean asked. He didn't even know why they went their separate ways in the first place. Maybe it was because they weren't teenagers anymore and had concept of what life really was like. Not just fun and games and fooling around.

"I don't know Dean...." He said looking down. "I know I missed you though. It's been to long time . Way too long" he said. He found himself smoothing his Tie. It was crooked, but he didn't care that much.

"Things been going good for you though. I see your name everywhere now." Dean said. It was hard for Dean seeing the man he once love so dearly everywhere he went. They barely even spoke these last four years. Dean realized that what was wrong in his life was because he didn't have Cas by his side anymore and nothing seemed right. He wanted to be young again when he and Cas thought they would take on the world together. Just the two of them and their pain in the asses brothers.

Castiel shrugged. He wrote that book because he missed Dean. It was the only place he could go and feel like everything was together again. Castiel was like a puzzle a five year old put together. Some of the pieces jammed in the wrong spot, some pieces missing, but still looks okay far away. "It's been hard too." Cas said not looking up at Dean.

"Really? You're 25 and have a best seller. Not really seeing what's been hard." Said Dean leaning back in his chair.

"Ever since......I don't know....it's just that I feel like something is missing." Castiel looked sad. He was missing Dean. He missed the way he smelled, the way he laughed, the way he smiled, he missed his hugs and his terrible singing. He just missed Dean fucking winchester, his best friend, his boyfriend, his hero.

Dean felt like he was missing something too. Nothing had been right. Everything was just weird. "What happened to the teenage Cas?" Dean asked. Maybe that's why they grew apart. They were growing up and maybe Dean wasn't ready to grow up. Dean didn't know anymore.

"I've grown up, Dean. I'm still me....just I learned a lot." Castiel smiled a little. He liked himself better today than his teenage self. He was a wreck then.

"How about we go back to my place and see much how much you have changed, huh?" Dean said a slight smiling forming. Castiel nods. He could never say no to going over to deans. Dean took Cas home with him. There were another pile of letters in deans mailbox. It was getting quite ridiculous now, Dean just left them in there. Dean took cas up to his apartment. It wasn't anything special, but it felt like Dean. It was small, but Dean made it his.

Once Dean closed the door to his apartment he pushed Castiel up against the wall. Dean kissed him over and over again. Castiel tried to keep up with Dean, but he had a hard time. Dean wanted to do this for so long. Maybe Castiel wasn't completely the same as when he first met him, but he wasn't either. Maybe it was time to let go and face that he might love Castiel more. It just took him quite awhile to realize that change didn't always mean something bad.

Dean tore off castiels dirty coat and unbuttoned his shirt. He pushed Castiel on the couch and climbed on top of him. "Still like this?" Dean asked taking off his own shirt. Castiel nodded pulling Dean down towards him. Their hands became acquainted with one another again. Moving together. Castiel pushed Dean off the couch and landed on top of him.

"Tell me if you want to stop." Said Cas unbuckling deans pants. He pushed his hand down deans jeans. He touched him slowly.

"C-c-Cas..." Dean said moving his hips up against castiels hand. Castiel smirked teasing Dean. Dean moaned when Castiel finally slipped his hands down his underwear. Castiel had his other hand on the side of deans head. He looked so beautiful. He missed Dean so much. He won't leave him again. He couldn't.

Castiel shoved deans pants down to his ankles. He put his mouth on Dean. Dean closed his eyes and ran his hands through castiels hair. He remembered when he did this to Cas for the first time. He Remembered How good it felt. It felt better this time. Everything felt better this time.

Dean and Cas did what they hadn't in four years, they loved each other again. They slept together side by side. Their limbs tangled with each other's. They felt like the found that missing piece. They felt the click when they first meant. They felt like two stupid teenagers in love again. Ready to give up anything for each other. And they did give up everything for each other. They gave up their lives they had been living for the past four years. They moved into a house together. They would still receive emails and letters from fans of the book and telling dean and cas how much they helped the,. When they did get a rude letter Dean and Cas would laugh at them together. Not everything went okay with them. There were agreements and disagreements, something they had to get used to. They used to never fight before, but they knew everything would work out because they had each other.


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

Dean brought Castiel back to their special place with the swing and the tree. The sun was rising and Dean was holding castiel in his arms. Every time they came here it's more breathtaking then the last time. "Hey Cas, why don't you go swing." Dean said quietly in Cas's ear. Castiel smiled and ran over to the swing. He would always love to swing, especially on this one. He started to push his legs back and forth. When he looked up at the leaves on the trees he could see a blue box in the branches. It had a sticky note that said "For Cas." On the outside of it. He swung higher and grabbed it out of the trees. He swung back down to a stop. He took the sticky and turned it over.

"Dear Cas,  
Your lips are red,  
Your eyes are blue,  
My angel Cas,   
this is for you."

Castiel smiled at the poem opening the box. There was a sliver ring with the words "my angel" engraved on the outside.

"Hey Cas." Dean said behind him. Castiel turned around and saw deans shirt he was hiding under his jacket, it said "Why don't you marry me" Castiel went to go hug him forgetting he was on the swing he fell. Dean laughed picking him, He pulled him into a kiss. Dean was pretty sure he was trying to run towards him and not away from him.

Dean took out his ring from his pocket. It was the same ring except it had the words "let me be your wings" on it. Castiel smiled tears rolling down his face. They were joyful tears. Castiel never thought he could be happier, but somehow Dean always made him. They put on their rings and smiled. Dean wasn't much of a romantic sap. Castiel was impressed by Dean for how well he put this together. He loved Him with all his heart, more than he ever had before, if that was even possible.

"Who the hell are Ya?" Said a boy who was roughly 16 years old. He had jeans and a T-shirt on with muddy boots.

"Cas look it's Curtis." Dean laughed. He remembered the last they came here and he had found them by this tree.

"I don reckon that I told you my name" he said crossing his arms over his chest.

"I'm Dean and this is Cas. We were here before and you caught us a while back." Dean was assumed by this.

"R'memb'r my pa has a rifle, If yous thinkin about tryin anythun." Curtis said staring at Dean and Cas together.

"Don't worry kid I'm not gonna try anything." Dean smiled looking down at him.

"We're yall boutta knock boots here?" He asked looking at deans shirt and his hand on castiels waist.

"No you see, the grass make my di--" Castiel stepped on deans foot before he had the chance of continuing that sentence. Castiel knew what Dean was going to say and it was not appropriate for this boy to hear.

"Disgustin' you wanna ram him in my yard." The boy didn't not look please. Castiel face grew red and he looked down.

"Alright kid I see your point. We will leave and I'll go ram him in my car." Dean smiled clapping castiels shoulder.

"Whateve makes yer cock hard." The boy said going to sit on the swing.

"We will be back here again sometime so keep your eyes out cause there might be more than one thing being plowed in these field." Dean smirked gathering their things. Castiels didn't really understand deans reference, but he was still embarrassed. He would have to ask dean when they got home.

"Okie-dokie." Said the kid. Dean laughed walking back with his Cas holding hands.

"I like that kid, he says okie-dokie." Dean smiled swinging their Hands all the way to his car.


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

Dean and Cas had their wedding together a couple months after they were engaged. Unfortunately Sams girlfriend, Jessica died in a car accident seven months earlier. It was still hard for sam. Gabriel had taken sam under his wing. Sam saw Gabriel as a brother to him and he was grateful to Gabe for taking care of him and making sure he finished law school after Jess died. Sam had plans to marry Jessica, but when she died so did some part of sam. Everyone tried to be there for him, but Gabriel was the one that helped him the most. He cleaned him up, kept him in line, and he did his best he could to get him to smile again. It took time, but sam eventually did get better. He still visited her grave every week, but that was something he needed to do. He loved to talk to her whether she talked back or not. Sam had faith that she was listening to him wherever she was. He often wrote letters to her and put them in a box by her grave. He was coping the best he could.

Gabriel and sam got all in their suits the day of the wedding, they were the best men. Dean and cas were having their wedding in the backyard of johns house. Dean and cas didn't really know a lot of people, so they didn't need a lot of room. Dean didn't want anything too fancy either. He wouldn't mind if they just went to Vegas did a quick marriage and spent the rest of their time eating pie and fucking each other senseless in a hotel room. But dean knew cas would something more romantic then that. It was a nice day out to have a wedding. Wasn't too hot or too cold. It was nice. 

When dean and cas were thinking of people to invite they had a hard time. They couldn't think of many people to invite besides some of deans family. The only family cas knew about was Gabriel and cas didn't make friends very easily. He liked to write most of the day and that didn't require talking to a lot of people. Dean was working on opening his own repair shop and the people in that business weren't really the type of people you invite to a wedding. They had to think a lot.

Gabriel however had a brilliant idea of inviting the fans of Castiels book, Now That I Look Back, to the wedding to fill up some seats. Of course he didn't tell dean or cas this, but he thought it was a great idea. He only invited a few fans, however. 

"What the hell Gabe, who the fuck are these people?" Dean asked pulling Gabe to the side after seeing the fans that he had never even met before. 

"Come on dean, you guys have like seven people here at the wedding. I think cas would appreciate it that i took upon myself to gather a few more people." Gabriel said with a grin on his face.

"Yeah not some crazed ass people. Get them the hell out before cas finds out." Dean said irritated with Gabriel. He should've known something was up when he saw that grin on Gaines face this morning. 

"Dean, people are here that liked my book. Isn't that wonderful?" Cas asked smiling walking over to Deanna me Gabe. He really did like how they were here supporting him and Dean. Not everyone was as supporting as some people. 

"Yeah it's great cas." Dean said smiling a little. Relieved that cas wasn't mad at all. If cas was happy then dean was happy. Today was about Cas and making it his day. Deans day was when they were on their honey moon and he had Cas to himself. Dean hated planes so dean planned a road trip for them. Just him, Cas, and baby(what dean called his car). It was a surprise to Cas, but Dean knew he would enjoy it. He always liked to go to small town diners and meet the people there. He had trouble starting conversations, but he knew how to keep one going if he wanted to. He was a writer after all. Always creating stories in his head. He used to spend a lot of time in his head. Alone with his thoughts, especially when he went to college. He liked the library. It was quiet and no one would bother you. It was wonderful, but also Terrible. After he and Dean grew apart he started to think about Dean all the time. It was almost all he could think about, but he never had the guts to pick up the phone and call Dean. He thought Dean didn't want him anymore and Dean thought Cas didn't need him anymore. They wished they could go back and fix everything, but they can't. They have the rest of their life to be together, they didn't need to think about what could have been, but what could be. 

Once Dean and Cas greeted the people that showed up for their wedding they went to their separate rooms to get dressed. Castiel put on his blue tie that he had on almost everyday. He put on his dark pants with his black shoes. He tucked his white dress shirt in and put on his blazer. Dean made him wear his trench coat too. Cas though he looked more like a detective from the 1940's then a man getting married. Cas knew Dean got this suit for him because Dean liked the old time movie. Classics Dean called them. Cas didn't always think they were very good, but Dean loved them. 

Dean put on a white button down with a blue checkered tie. He put on a dark blue waistcoat with his matching pants. He put on suspenders because he thought suspenders were cool and attractive, he wasn't wrong. He slipped on his suit jacket and combed his hair. Dean never combed his hair unless he wanted to impress Castiel. Dean grabbed a rose he bought for Cas and headed back out to the backyard. Sam greeted him there smiling at Dean. He knew how to clean himself up. "You look good, Dean." Sam smiled at his smaller brother. 

"Hell yeah I do." Dean smirked Dean would be lying if he said he wasn't nervous. He was scared shitless of today. Afraid something would go wrong and Cas would get upset. He wanted this to be perfect for him. He deserved it.

Dean waited for Cas, but he didn't see him for awhile. He went inside the house to find him talking to his old librarian, Mrs. Howl. Dean loved that lady too. He was glad Cas kept in touch and Invited her to the wedding. She was a good women. "Taking my soon to be husband away from me," Dean asked smiling walking over to them. Damn Cas looked good. He looked fucking perfect in his suit. Dean wanted to ditch the wedding and just skip to their road trip he planed.

"No Dean. We were just talking." Said Castiel looking at Dean. Up and down and all around. He never saw Dean look this good. He could get used to him like this.

"I know you were." Dean said wrapping his arm around castiels waist. 

"I'll see you two love birds outside" said mrs. Howl before leaving the two of them alone. 

"Feeling good Cas?" Dean asked walking in front of him, pulling him close. He wanted to kiss him, but Cas insisted that the only time they could today was when they got married. 

"Yes Dean. Very good." He smiled softly. He was nervous, but in a good way. Dean straighten Cas tie and jacket, they were a bit off centered as they usually were. 

"Alright so I walk down the aisle first then you're second. Sam marries us and then i carry you off into the sunset. Got it?" Dean asked. Castiel smiled and nodded. He could wait to be carried off in the sunset. And he practically was. When Sam said dean could kiss Cas, Dean swept him off his feet while kissing him and carried him to his car. They already had the wedding pie before hand. Dean wasn't a traditional wedding kind of guy, he usually just did what he thought fit. 

Dean couldn't help himself, but to kiss him all the way to the car. He put Cas in the car and got in himself. It was hard to resist not jumping Cas in the back seat. He looked stunning in his suit. It was hard to focus on driving when Castiel decided it would be a good idea to give Dean a blow job while he was driving. He eventually just pulled over and gave up. He let Cas do whatever he want to him there. He didn't really care if people knew what was going on or not his focus was on Cas right now. His focus was always on Cas after that day. After their wedding Dean made sure Cas had the world and Cas made sure that he made deans world. They were practically one person after that day. They could just look at each other instead of talking and still get the message across. It reminded dean like the relationship he has with Sam. He and Sam knew each other their whole life and they could tells hat was wrong by the way they walked. Dean loved that. Dean loved his family, no matter how small or dysfunctional it may be at times it was his family and he couldn't ask for more. Neither could Cas. He could be living on the streets and still be happy with Dean. They were best friends and nothing would or could change that. Everyone knew how much they cared about each other and no one dared messed with them out of fear of what Dean Winchester might do to you. He was never afraid to fight for Cas, or his family. They were his family and no one could take them away from him.


End file.
